It Should Be 100% Legal To Challenge Your Coworker To Hand To Hand Combat
Right off the bat, go watch Beer Game Show. This newest episode is a great time, packed with everything you could ever want in a show. We've got dump buckets of sour milk, glutinous displays of eating, but most importantly - coworkers engaging in hand to hand combat.
Whacking the hell out of you coworker with a duct taped pool noodle is oddly satisfying. So satisfying, I believe hand to hand gladiatorial combat with non-lethal weapons should be implemented across all offices nationwide. The days of passive aggressive emails and tip toeing around issues will be long gone. If Rick from the 3rd floor wants to roll his eyes and tell you how his dusty ass used to do things back in his day, well he's going to have to meet the business end of America's favorite floatation aid.
America is the best country in the world, but lately it seems we have lost our way. People love to stand around and point fingers at what could be the problem - identity politics, the economy, values, but I'm here to tell you the answer is dueling. In 1859 the United States outlawed the classic pistol duel. What happened two years later? The entire country split in half and started the bloodiest war in American history. Abe Lincoln's wrestling record was beyond impressive at around 300-1. You don't think Lincoln could have beat anyone from the south in a hand to hand combat duel?
The office duel is exactly what every work place needs. Besides squashing beef immediately on the spot, it improves office morale. Nothing like cheering on your friend, or watching the one guy the entire office can't stand get what's coming to him. The entire Barstool office gave Rone a standing ovation when he brought Tommy Smokes to his knees. If hand to hand combat helped our office, it can help any office out there.
P.S. Rone flying through the air, dual weilding his noodle after it snapped in half was incredible. The screenshot with the smoke on the arena floor is absolute cinema. Go watch Beer Game Show for more moments like this.
