Surviving Barstool S4 Ep. 3 | Shocking Betrayal Rocks the TribesWATCH NOW

LOTTERY BANGER: The Sixers Have A 1.1% Chance At Getting The #1 Overall Pick

ALL HAIL LORD HINKIE.

Wait a second. The Sixers won 52 games this season and could not possibly be granted the #1 overall pick. What is this lottery sorcery you speak of? Gather around, my children. Let me tell you about a legend named Sam…

OK. The Sixers are most likely aren’t going to get the #1 overall pick. But there’s a chance. There’s always a chance. The Sixers (mostly) hold the LA Lakers 2018 selection, and possibly Sacromento’s 2019 unprotected pick depending how the balls are fondled this evening. How long has this pick been lagging around for? It goes all the way back to the 2012 off-season in a deal that involved freaking Steve Nash going from the Suns to the Lakers. Here’s how she goes tonight:

If the Lakers ball drops like the most spry pubescent young male to ever live at the #1 overall pick (a 1.1% possibility), Hinkie will be resurrected.

If it falls in picks 2 thru 5, the Boston Celtics receive the honor and the Sixers would be relegated to the Sacramento Kings 2019 unprotected first round selection.

If it (most likely) lands 6 thru 14, the Sixers make that pick.

Simple as that. Well, at least until Colangelo somehow makes it the more complicated than it needs to be and Boston somehow steals the entire draft. Again. As far as getting the #1 pick, it only took 232 draft lottery simulations to see the Sixers snag the top spot.

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Hey, stranger things have happened. Maybe. Actually, probably not. Whatever. Still, LeBron, Kawhi, and PG are waiting on everyone to CUE IT!