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60 Minutes Interviewed What Only Can Be Described As A Witch: He Can Google With His Brain

This dude is a witch. I know it. Well, technically I think he would be a wizard but that’s neither nor there. Of course, I’ve seen and read all the different Harry Potter books/movies so I know that the proper nomenclature is wizard and that he’d be in Ravenclaw. Fuckin book worm.

That notwithstanding, I think we gotta burn this dude. There’s not a chance in hell that he doesn’t weigh as much as a duck. I bet he floats too. (not a newt. Got better)

That being said, if this comes out on the mass market, we are fucked. I would never pay attention to anything ever again. If that happened, I wouldn’t have noticed the time that Spotify started to play Iris as covered by Boys II Men which was originally recorded by the Goo Goo Dolls. Luckily for you and me, I did.