Does This Look Like The Face Of A Donut-Eating Champion Who Got Caught Stealing From A Dunkin Donuts?

The Independent — A North Carolina man who made headlines when he was caught for break-ins after winning a doughnut-eating contest has been arrested again. And this time he’s accused of stealing from a doughnut shop. The Virginian-Pilot newspaper reports 27-year-old Bradley Hardison of Elizabeth City was charged Thursday with stealing from a Dunkin’ Donuts in November. An Elizabeth City Police Department statement says he’s charged with felonies including breaking and entering and larceny. It wasn’t clear if he helped himself to any doughnuts.

When hiding in plain sight goes wrong. Or he thinks he has an invisible all-access card to every donut place in the world since he’s the donut-eating champion. Like Happy Gilmore with Subway sandwiches after his endorsement deal. Or he has such an insatiable thirst for donuts that he can’t stop himself from breaking into any and all donut places and stuffing his face. That’d be my bet. You don’t become the greatest in the world at anything and have an OFF switch. The only thing I can compare it to is Michael Jordan. MJ is the most competitive person to walk God’s green earth. It was that way for him on the court and it stayed being that way when the game was over. There are countless stories of MJ being a maniac off the court. Same must go for this donut-eating champion. He’s just like MJ. He’s married to the game and it landed him in trouble.

Whichever one it is, it’s gonna be a hard sell to the cops when they catch you stealing from a Dunkin Donuts. You’re the donut champ. Imagine this dude being like, “No I, the donut-eating champion of the world, didn’t steal from a Dunkin Donuts. You got the wrong guy. I swear.”