If You Think Rain Is Better Than Snow Then You're An Idiot And A Fool And An Idiot

This is an old blog but I feel like it’s applicable today. I’ll take this over a light rain every day of the week.

(For the record I definitely did not google “pretty New York snow” and “bad New York rain” for these pictures in order to influence your thoughts)

I know people who live in the suburbs or anywhere but a city are going to disagree with this but that’s fine, I don’t care. You guys don’t matter. I guess you people decide elections or whatever, but aside from once every four years no one on earth cares about your opinions. Shovel your driveway and shut up.

For starters, snow is pretty. At least it is at first. Snowfall is like a significant other: at first it’s new and exciting and beautiful then eventually it gets ugly and annoying and you can barely recognize it compared to the day it hit the ground, but you’ll still always remember that first time it fell and filled you with childlike wonder. Rain sucks from the jump. It’s a wet blanket on an entire region and immediately ruins the day. Snow is tranquil, rain is chaotic.

When was the last time anyone’s ever had a rain day? I’ll tell you, the answer is never. When it rains you still need to do everything you do on a regular day except you need to do it wet and with shitty hair. Snow is an excuse for everything. When it snows I’ll leave the house 20 minutes later than usual and just say, “Sorry, roads are horrible,” and everyone just nods in agreement.

How about rain parties? Or playing in the rain? Anyone ever do that shit? No. When it rains everyone is just fucking miserable but when it snows people will go to the bar and drink together because snow brings us closer together. Snow is like a universal donor, it can be anything you want it to be. Want an excuse to do nothing? Snow’s got you. An excuse to go out? Snow’s got you there too. Rain, on the other hand, is just like a little cold where you still have to do everything you usually only it makes you hate doing it. In fact, I even like driving in the snow more than I like driving in the rain. You can’t see shit in the rain and it’s loud and intimidating and no one even slows down because of it, you can’t really see shit in the snow either but at least it looks like you’re in Warp Speed and everyone takes it a little easier.

Thank you for reading my proof that if you think rain is better than snow then you’re an idiot and a fool and an idiot. Enjoy your day.