Surviving Barstool S4 Ep. 3 | Shocking Betrayal Rocks the TribesWATCH NOW

Lane Wants Bama

Listen Lane knows good and well what would happen if FAU squared off against Bama on the gridiron. That game would be over in 17 seconds max. And he admits that here. He doesn’t want to play Bama in football. He wants Nick Saban to be forced to think about him for a few weeks leading up to their game. He wants to have the grad assistant running his Twitter account tweeting pictures of Saban’s daughter with the horned devil and the purple pickle emojis at 3:23 in the morning only to delete them at 7:52 AM. It would be pure mayhem and frankly if the Bowl Selection Committee had any brains they’d make this a reality.

Outside of degenerates, no one really cares about the ancillary bowls now that the CFB Playoffs are a thing. And if Clemson & Wisconsin win tonight and Bama is ultimately left out of the final four this is an absolute no brainer. Make the spread a billion, the over a trillion, and have the FAU Owls play Bama at a neutral site. Hell, play it in Bryant-Denny so Lane can pull various pranks in Saban’s office. Again, the game itself doesn’t matter in the slightest. Whatever recipe allows for the maximum amount of hijinks is what we deserve. Do the right thing here, Bowl Selection Committee. Give the people what they want.