Guest Speaker Shows Some High Schoolers A Little Porn During An Assembly

A guest speaker was removed from Midlothian High School Monday morning after an inappropriate picture appeared on a large screen during his career day presentation, according to school officials

The best part of this story is that we don’t know a ton of details. The details that we do know are vague at best. A presenter was going through a power point presentation with an assembly of 10th graders. During the presentation, a picture of a pornographic image went on the screen. The presenter threw his hands up and said, “That’s not mine. That’s not mine.” He was then escorted off. That’s where the facts end and my speculation begins.

I think it was a vagina. Pure and simple. I think there was a vagina spread open as wide as the sky on that overhead projector. I think the sophomores at Midlothian High School were treated to a spread eagle coochie a few days before Thanksgiving. Same holiday. Different spread. Two fingers and whatnot. And you know what? I don’t care about it.

When the internet was just a young buck and wasn’t cruising at high speeds, I used to download and print… that’s right print… pictures of Jennifer Love Hewitt. Sometimes she was in a bathing suit. Sometimes she was fully clothed. Either way, the results were the same. Buddy,,, I was jerking off.

Do you know how hard it is to jerk off to the same printed photo of a clothed television star? It’s very difficult. I, like generations before me, am glad that things have improved and that streaming sites are available to our youths.

I say all of that to say this; don’t try to tell me that you need to contact the kids’ parents about this spread eagle puss puss that they saw in an assembly. These rowdy teens are looking at pornographic films that we can’t even imagine. The room fell silent on assembly day, not because of the shock at seeing a vagina, but because it was just a plain-ass vagina. They were shocked because the vagina wasn’t pierced and filled with a creampie. I’m not talking Thanksgiving snacks either, folks. I’m talkin… you guessed it.. cum. Let’s cut this presenter a little slack. It is the holidays after all. Merry Christmas. We’re saying it again.