We Just Tried To Contact Aliens And We Did It With A 33-Track Mixtape

Business Insider — Humanity’s first contact with aliens could be a breezy 24 years away. We sent a signal to an Earth-like planet that may host life – and we sent them a mixtape.

The project, called “Sónar Calling GJ 273b,” is a team effort led by the Sónar music festival in collaboration with METI (Messaging to Extra-Terrestrial Intelligence) International and the Institute of Space Studies of Catalonia in Spain. Following is a transcript of the video.

Humans just tried to contact intelligent aliens.

On Oct. 16, 17, and 18 a team of musicians and scientists sent a message to aliens. They sent the message via radio waves and transmitted it 9 different times. This helps ensure that all the information reaches its destination

What’s in the message?

Thirty-three musical pieces, each 10 seconds long, a tutorial on how humans keep time, and when we will be listening for a response.

God dammit these aliens are going to think we’re the softest little beta bitch pussy ass gravelers in the galaxy. Great. Of course we leave it to NASA to handle the communications and those nerds come up with a mixtape. Honestly can’t trust them with anything these days. Aliens will get this message and laugh their dicks off at the earthlings over in the Milky Way lying in bed with a box of tissues watching The Notebook waiting for that reply text. Brutal.

Live look at first contact.

You know what we should send? Video of the thermo nuclear bomb. An Air Force recruitment video. Rory McIlroy hitting a driver. George W Bush dodging that shoe. Brady banging Gisele. That shit’s impressive. That shit’s intimidating. That’s humanity at its peak.

We should show our best not our worst. We want those fuckers thinking, “Oh shit, these savages can play ball.”

We do not want them thinking, “lol they put Goodbye My Lover on the mixtape.”

Embarrassing, NASA. Embarrassing. We’re so fucked when the aliens get our mixtape.

PS — Speaking of Mickstape.