Local Florida Hero Gets Arrested For DUI While Driving His Lawn Mower Around

PORT ST. LUCIE, Fla. – A man was arrested on a DUI charge last week in Port St. Lucie after police spotted him riding a lawn mower, carrying a case of beer and driving erratically on an access road. A Port St. Lucie police officer spotted 56-year-old Kenneth Burton Alleshouse on Nov. 3 at about 6:15 p.m. The officer stopped Alleshouse driving the lawn mower and could smell a strong odor of alcohol emitting from him.

Oh I’m sorry. So a guy can’t get drunk and mow his lawn anymore? I thought this was America. Drinking and cutting the grass might as well be America’s logo. It should be the American flag and then a logo of a man slugging a cold one atop a riding lawn mower. I’ve stated in this space before that I love mowing the lawn. It was one of my main passions as a teenager. So I can imagine how this would extend to adulthood and what do you do when you’re an adult? You drink. You drink and you mow the lawn. It’s as American as apple pie, maybe even more so.

KFC Radio once did a poll asking what’s the best situation to have a beer. A beer while mowing the lawn was one of the top answers people gave. And sure, it sounds like this guy made a slight detour to the liquor store for a beer run. But what is he supposed to do after he drinks all the beer he had in his fridge? Stop drinking? LOL. Yeah right. Or maybe you want him to get in a car and drive to the liquor store? That seems dangerous. How fast does a lawn mower even go? 7 MPH? He’s not gonna hurt anyone. Minus the spinning Samurai sword that sits under the lawn mower, it’s basically a really really slow golf cart. Let the man drink and mow in peace.