NFL Announcer Sam Rosen Mailed In Yesterday's Halftime Promo On Fox (Or Maybe It Was Dick Stockton, Your Choice)

Hit the music!

UPDATE: Oopsy daisy, it was Dick Stockton. Time to wear the scarlet letter of Barstool.

Under internet code, I unfortunately must keep the rest of the blog written as is so I can be properly shamed instead of search and replacing the names and deleting a couple of poorly written jokes. Plus that picture of Sam’s face on the Mailtime logo cracks me the fuck up.

Shout out to longtime Rangers play-by-play guy Sam Rosen for slapping a Forever stamp on that promo, licking the envelope, and sending it on its way. That dude has been grinding for way too long to worry about getting every last detail of a promo during a Rams-Jaguars game. Yes, that was the best possible Rams-Jags game we will probably ever see. But Sam I Make Promos Tastier Than Green Eggs And Ham knows that any NFL fan worth their salt tunes out any promo or commercial that happens on Sunday, no matter who is playing. The Red Zone Channel beat that out of our brains years ago. Only casual fans even know what is happening between the plays. If you aren’t staring at your phone for updates on your fantasy football matchup or the other games you bet on, you are doing football wrong. Shit, I bet Rosen saw that Jordan Howard went bananas in overtime for him and that’s why his mind wondered elsewhere. You can only do so many third tier games on Fox before you just start reading directly off the teleprompter. Especially when those two bullet points are about how the Chiefs are looking to stay undefeated and the Raiders are doing the physical act of hosting the Chargers. I actually hope Sammy Sweet Pipes was doing the jerk off motion with his hand as he read the end of that promo.

And yeah, Sam probably went full Ron Burgundy with a twist of Markelle Fultz on draft night.

But at least Yung Rosen didn’t go all Jay Feely on our asses and start making shit up.

I have to admit, I never thought I would be writing a Sam Rosen blog, but I watched my first regular season Rangers game in forever last week and not hearing him do play-by-play made it seem like a preseason game. It’s crazy how Sam Rosen’s voice during an NFL game makes you think being hungover watching a sloppy London game early in the morning but his voice during a hockey game makes it seem official as fuck.

I also have been starting to get excited about the chance of the Giants landing either of the top 2 QBs in this year’s draft class, but since I am a casual college football fan that is backlogged about 3 years worth of sleep, I always get Sam Darnold and Josh Rosen mixed up and always lump their names together and think one of them is Sam Rosen. After this blog, that will never happen again. So shout out the real deal Sam Rosen for letting that silver tongue slip on live TV.

And that was talking Sam Rosen.