Antonio Cromartie and His Unstoppable Sperm Successfully Deliver Baby No. 14
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Page Six – The Cromarties have added a new member to their roster.
Antonio Cromartie, 33, and wife Terricka welcomed their sixth child together, daughter Jhett Paxton, on Aug. 30, Us Weekly confirmed. The latest addition is Cromartie’s 14th overall, as he is the father to eight other kids from previous relationships with seven women. …
The couple wed in November 2008, three years before the former New York Jet said he had a vasectomy. Following their latest pregnancy announcement in May, Terricka told Page Six she would get her “tubes tied” after baby No. 6.
“We are 100 percent done! Absolutely positively done with having kids,” Terricka said. …
On Thursday, Terricka revealed she and her husband of eight years would star in the upcoming series “The Cromarties.”
I have two things to say to Terricka. First, congratulations. Getting impregnated once again by The Father of Our Country might not put you in an elite category necessarily, but it’s special any time the next Cromartie child is brought into the world. So we’re all happy for this 14th blessed event. Well done.
Second, if you think getting your tubes tied is going to keep Cro from getting you pregnant with number 15 – and more – you’ve got another thing coming, my dear. Medical science can’t stop the super sperm of Antonio Cromartie. It never has and never will. His baby batter conquered the vasectomy. A little thing like a hysterectomy doesn’t stand a chance. Those swimmers leaped the great surgical void doctors cut into his vas deferens like Christian Bale’s Batmobile and they’d do it again to your Fallopian tubes.
You could have Cro flown to South America and locked in a vault for a day, have doctors surgically remove your uterus, fly it to the Arctic Circle and have oil riggers drill it deep into the permafrost. And by the time your husband went wheels up on the flight home, you’d be carrying twins. Instead of making bold predictions that do nothing but taunt his mighty penis, you ought to be getting together with NSA to put him on a list of people to be saved in case of a nuclear holocaust so he can repopulate the world.
In the meantime, you can be damned right I’ll be watching The Cromarties when it comes on. And I look forward to the Very Special Episode when Terricka finds out she’s pregnant. It’s inevitable.