Best Man Gets Pornhub To Help Out On His Speech For The Groom By Revealing All His Porn Favorites
The guests erupt into fits of giggles as the cheeky chappy reveals he convinced the largest pornographic distributor in the world to help him surprise his childhood friend. Thom said: “It’s only fair on his wedding that Danny, being a man of the world, was made a video by Pornhub.” As the video begins to play, a woman wearing a Pornhub T-shirt introduces herself as Aria with a message from Danny’s “old friend” Pornhub. She said: “Danny, your stamina and loyalty is very much appreciated. “All the girls are gutted to hear that you’re getting married.” On top of showing embarrassing pictures of the new husband, Aria reveals to guests a map showing all the places he has accessed the adult website across the world.
Usually best man speeches flashback to some stupid stories the groom and best man have shared and then conclude with getting emotional and how they love each other blah blah blah, but not for this motherfucker Thom. Nope, this guy contacted Pornhub to get his boy Danny’s favorites in just a diabolical move. Not only did he get the favorites, but he got all the random countries he’s accessed the site from around the globe.
RUTHLESS. Safe to say Danny boy likes to travel and I mean at least he’s not cheating on his wife right? This dude has cranked one off in six of the seven fucking continents. I mean that’s just impressive if you’re asking me, but if he’s a real porn guy he’ll travel to Antarctica to complete the career grand slam. I’m not going to lie though, it’s a tough look if that fraud Mia Khalifa is in your top five most searched girls. I mean that’s just flat out embarrassing if you’re asking me.
In regards to his top videos what the fuck is the Royal Society of Fit Bird Watching? Dude has a fetish for birds? He’s also into lesbian porn clearly which is a red flag as we’ve all discussed. Also, I know we all have our go-to videos, but watching one over 300 times sees extreme. I guess I also haven’t cranked in six different continents so I can’t relate.
Overall, Danny got away here without any crazy shit besides a bird fetish. Hand to God if this were to happen to me at my wedding my wife would flat out walk away from the whole thing. It would break her and her image of me as a person, as I’d imagine what would happen to about 80% of us. You can type in just about any letter on my home laptop and God fucking knows what’s going to pop up as a suggested search, nevermind my Pornhub search.
It looks like the wife took this well and laughed it off, but I’m willing to bet most wives would never let this down and judge you for the rest of eternity because women are women. I’d say them being a European couple is the main reason everything is fine. They just laugh these things off as a classic prank. This happens to a Jersey or New York bride and groom and that marriage is OVER.