Anthony Rizzo Hit Another Lead Off Yabo Tonight And Now Everyone Is Hitting Yabos

I’m so busy being pissed at Joe Maddon about hitting Anthony Rizzo lead off that I don’t even have time to enjoy this oppo taco bomb and Happ’s side salad solo shot. This team is the emotionally abusive girlfriend I spent years getting over. And I’m still not over it. THAT SAID GUYS, I think I love Anthony Rizzo more than I love myself, and I’m a big ego guy. Some would even say yuge.

Point is, you can’t be The Guy more than Anthony Rizzo has this week. He’s a savage right now. Monday was one of the most uniquely embarrassing offensive performances in extended memory. Since then, this lineup has been en fuego and I tip my cap to Rizzo for getting it going at the top.  And as everyone knows, hitting is contagious. So technically Rizzo is responsible for some of Happ’s encore Yabo. That or Happ is still riding high off his insane game last night – Golden Sombrero and a Grand Salami.

Keep it rolling boys.

UPDATE: Kyle Schwarber Just Entered North Korean Air Space

UPDATE: Cubs lose 9-4

UPDATE