The Curious Case Of Doug Overton's Penis
PHILLY VOICE – Former 76er and La Salle basketball star Doug Overton has broken his silence over his arrest last weekend for indecent exposure to claim that he was simply relieving himself in the woods and this is all just one big misunderstanding.
Overton, a Big 5 Hall of Famer and the current men’s basketball coach at nearby Lincoln University, said in a statement that he was walking the Cynwyd Heritage Trail in Montgomery County on Sunday — which he typically does three or four times per week – when nature called.
“As I sometimes do, I stopped to pick up a cup of tea on my way to the trail,” Overton said in his statement. “Of course, during the walk I felt the need to relieve myself. With the nearest bathroom nearly a mile away, I stepped off the trail and into a wooded area to take care of business in what I thought was a discreet manner.”
Overton asserts that he pulled up his sweat pants after taking his ill-advised leak and returned to the trail to continue walking his dog, and that that’s “the only thing that happened.”
“Unfortunately, it appears I wasn’t as discreet as I thought, and some misinterpreted what they saw,” Overton said. “I sincerely apologize for my lapse of judgment and the confusion it caused.”
So Doug Overton got arrested for having his dick out on a trail. Life doesn’t give you a handbook for every little situation, but having your penis out on a bike path should probably inherently fall in the “never do this” column. The original story looked BAD. But then Overton comes back and says that he was just peeing. He had too much tea (?), and had to relieve himself on the side of the path. Imagine peeing on the side of the road and then getting arrested for it. It would be horrific. No man deserves to have his life ruined for peeing in nature.
But the story isn’t quite that simple.
Overton was arrested after a married couple alleged that he strolled down the trail with his penis fully exposed while appearing “content with the situation.”
Uhh, “strolling down the trail with his penis fully exposed” doesn’t sound like peeing. It doesn’t even sound like something that could ever be confused with peeing. Cause, see, every time in my life that I have ever peed, I put my penis away right after. Without fail. Every single time. I’m like an ironman of always putting my penis away. And, without surveying the office mind you, I’m quite confident all other guys always put their dick away.
So WHY would a couple see him strolling down the path with his dick out? That’s not the kind of thing that you mistake. I highly doubt the couple was trying to spice up their marriage by falsely accusing a jogger of indecent exposure.
From the original report:
According to his arrest affidavit, Overton then reportedly continued down the trail with his penis exposed, stopping to watch the female witness stretch for approximately three minutes before heading east with his dog while his genitals were still completely out of his pants.
The male witness described Overton as “walking calmly and deliberately,” seemingly aware that he was exposing himself but “content with the situation.”
So he was exposing his cock on a walk like he was cock of the walk? Heavy stuff.
When I was in grade school, Doug Overton would come to pick up his kids from the after school program. He was one of the first athletes I’ve ever seen up close in person. It was a huge for me then, so it’s a little of a bummer for me now to see someone I looked up to flopping his dick all over the place. And it’s even worse for his family, regardless if the story turns out to be true. If he’s doing it maliciously, fuck him. If he needs help, I hope he gets it. And if this is somehow a huge misunderstanding, I hope all is ironed out and forgiven.
But it’s just a reminder to all us men out there. Guard those penises jealously.