The 2017 Wave Wipeouts Of The Year Video Is One Giant Bundle Mania

First of all, it’s March. Releasing a best of 2017 anything is a bit presumptuous. That’s like pimping out Carson Wentz’s NFL HOF footage now, which with Philly’s luck will end up being career highlight film. Regardless, these waves, they’ll swallow you whole. These dudes got absolutely ragdolled before going straight to Davy Jones’ Locker. The worst part is they’re probably underwater for 20+ seconds before being able to breathe again. That’s some scary shit. If I’m grabbing the rings at the deep end of a pool and can’t get back up when I instantly want, it’s spaz central. I’m talking flailing arms, shitting pants, fear of death type of panic, and that’s just over a nanosecond of not being able to breathe. These guys are probably chilling underneath the sea like Sebastion the crab looking for someone to Lobster. Can’t say I don’t respect it. These shredders are riding a mountain of a swell and I’m petrified to go past my belly button in the ocean. Really puts one’s pussiness in perspective.

Obligatory: Utah, give me two.