Somebody Left A Dead Shark In A Walmart Shopping Cart And Yes This Happened In Florida

ST. AUGUSTINE, Fla. — Authorities are mystified as to why a 5-foot-long dead shark was left in the parking lot of a northeast Florida Wal-Mart just days before another dead shark was found nearby. The St. Augustine Record reports St. Johns County Sheriff’s deputies were called to the store parking lot last week after the shark was found in a shopping cart. Deputies talked to the owner of an RV parked nearby and learned that the RV owner had woken to find the shark on his vehicle’s hood. The owner said he then put it in the cart. The sheriff’s office says days later they were called to driveway in Vilano Beach and found another dead shark.

A good ol’ fashioned Florida whodunnit! Who is going around north Florida tossing dead sharks on the windshields of RVs? Reveal yourself! You need to pay the price for your crime. But also kinda shoutout to him or her cause sharks are scary AF and that’s one less shark breathing. I view sharks the same way I view spiders. We are at an all out war with them every single day. Humans vs them. Get them before they get us. Dead sharks can’t kill people. Fact. By the way, good luck to the Florida police (probably not a thing, probably city based) catching this person. They’re suspect list has to be endless for a crime like this. It wouldn’t surprise me to find out there’s a file cabinet marked Likely To Throw Dead Shark On Motor Vehicles. Remember the movie Bruce Almighty with Jim Carrey? There’s a scene during that movie where Carrey meets Morgan Freeman (God) and he shows him an endless file cabinet. That’s how big the file cabinet is for Florida suspects of this crime. So best of luck to them even though I hope they don’t catch him because humans > sharks.