Quick Tutorial On How Not To Ride An Escalator When Drunk

Pretty short and sweet. When drunk don’t A) try to run down the up escalator and 2) slide down the middle when you run out of breath. Unless of course broken legs and fractured skulls are sort of your thing. Then have at it.

By the way, there is nothing worse than a drunk injury. It’s been a while for me but I remember getting injured a few times in my early 20’s solely because I was too drunk. You have that moment where your brain figures out what is going on but your body can’t catch up and you know that you’re absolutely fucked the second you wake up from your drunk. You try to downplay it in your mind, you try to tell yourself you’ll be fine, but in the back of your head you know a few too many beers just inconvenienced your life for a significant period of time in the future. Such an empty awful feeling. Or you could be flat out dead, that sucks too.