White House Report: Time To Accelerate Robotic Spacecraft And Space Bomb Development To Save Earth From Asteroids

We are NOT prepared for an asteroid strike, says White House document https://t.co/yiR7JJBL56

— Psiley (@blazeymc91) January 6, 2017

Daily Mail — Now the White House has released an official document describing the plan if a meteor or asteroid was to head our way, and it shows we are under-prepared…

The White House published its ‘National Near-Earth Object Preparedness Strategy’.

The document ‘seeks to improve our nation’s preparedness to address the hazard of near-Earth object (NEO) impacts by enhancing the integration of existing national and international assets and adding important capabilities that are currently lacking.’

NEOs are asteroids or comets that have an orbit that brings them near or into Earth’s orbit.

A doomsday asteroid scare is something I need to be around for. Something I need to experience. Something I need to ride or die on. Look at how exhilarating watching and betting sports is. Up 10 trying to avoid the garbage time backdoor cover? The USA/Canada shootout from the World Juniors last night? Tiger’s birdie putt on the 72nd hole at Torrey Pines in 2008? That shit is WILD. Almost can’t watch it. So goddamn nerve wracking it changes your life, changes who you are, takes you over as a person in the most thrilling way possible.

Well imagine a fucking asteroid. Imagine the world gets news we’ve got a global killer heading straight for us. Imagine we throw some space ninjas up there with robots and nukes and shit trying to force this bazillion year old asteroid to change course and miss us. That would be AWESOME. Most thrilling spectacle in human history. Wolf Blitzer calling nuke impact after nuke impact.

“CNN is now ready to call: Little Boy II will go to the northeastern hemisphere.”

I’m getting excited just thinking about it. And the White House is right — we better get moving on some sort of plan here. Cuz if one of these fucker’s is coming right at us and we can’t do anything but just chill here on the surface waiting to get eviscerated and eliminated from the universe forever without any sort of drama or build up or hope I’m gonna be pissed. What a letdown that would be. What a missed opportunity. Delivered too many Syria blogs for that.

PS — This is very comforting: