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A Delivery Guy Peeing In The Elevator Before Dropping Off The Food Is An Absolute Savage Move

This is the thing about this move. I don’t actually HATE it. I mean don’t get me wrong, this guy should have been taken out of civilization the millisecond he whipped his dick out in an elevator. But the thing is that it appears to be the perfect crime. If someone pisses in your elevator, you immediately think that its the weirdo in your building or some drunk asshole. Nobody ever suspects the delivery guy.

But the problem I have with this move (other than it being completely vile) is that he’s holding the food in his dick hand. At least have some decency and put my food in your non-dick hand or god forbid your mouth. If my receipt has a few drips of piss, I’ll just subtract a star or 3 in my Yelp review. But I can’t have my food hanging under a guy’s undercarriage or get a rogue pube in my delivery package, even if I deserve it because I willingly accepted a delivery from a dude with a mullet in 2016.