Argentine Model Says Lionel Messi Sucked In Bed And Was "Like A Dead Body"

The Sun- LIONEL MESSI is arguably the best footballer on the planet – but he is rubbish in bed, it has been astonishingly claimed. Argentine model Xoana Gonzalez said in 2011 she slept with the Barcelona superstar after a party. But she has now sensationally opened up on the supposed incident – and slammed her compatriot for his performance in the sack. Speaking on Peruvian TV, she said: “It was many years ago. In truth he was very young. But he knew what he was doing, was not minor, that was the important thing. “His security told me ‘got someone you want to know’. I was curious to see who it was, and froze when I saw it was my idol Messi. “I said that he is the wimp, though, because he sent his security to get me. There I noticed that he is very shy. “When one plays across the whole pitch you expect someone to return the favour. I wanted him to show me more than that. At one point I felt like I was with a dead body.”

First of all, this REEKS of some nobody Instagram model who wants the spotlight for a few seconds. Slandering the good name of Lionel Messi in the process. I don’t even know if I believe she slept with him. That feels far fetched right away. But let’s say he did. Let’s say Messi fucked this chick and it was subpar. Who cares? Just because a guy is the best at soccer means he’s supposed to provide the best fuck job too? That doesn’t equate in my brain. You can’t be the best at everything. And maybe he was running on an empty stomach. Maybe he was hungover. Maybe he was tired after being the best soccer player in the world. Ever think of that? All I’m saying is it’s not fair. You can’t take a guy’s performance one time and then paint with a broad that he’s always like that. Everybody has a bad outing or 30. This chick is just jealous she only got the dick one time and reaped none of the rewards. Case closed.

One last lesson. Never fuck your idols cause they might not fuck you right. That’s a lesson for all you ladies out there

“His security told me ‘got someone you want to know’. I was curious to see who it was, and froze when I saw it was my idol Messi.”