Clayton Kershaw Lighting Up The Radar Gun With This 46-MPH Rocket

I’m not going to throw stones here. Clayton Kershaw has more Cy Youngs, money, and talent as a human than I’ll have in the next 20 lifetimes. But what the shit was that meatball? And how Ty Flowers not send that pitch into orbit? That’s a professional ballplayer getting a beer league softball served for dinner. He could’ve triple clutched and still mashed it out of the park.

Regardless, I don’t know if that pitch slipped or if it was on purpose. If it was, then I’m still all sorts of confused my the “Eephus” pitch. Like this one last year by the Japanese. Always trying to pull a fast one when you’re not paying attention.

Come on, blue! Live a little and ring him up. The pitch’s trajectory made it a ball but it was close enough for a viral strike 3 call tailor made for the Internet. Make your mark on the world and come out of the shower ringing him up. Plus what is the hitter doing? It’s 2 strikes. You gotta grow up and protect.

Shoulda, coulda, woulda. Guess I just wanted to see a pitcher pay for listening to Henry Roedgartner’s MILF advice to Float It. Shit like this doesn’t work outside of Hollywood. Example A, even though A-Rod was on enough sauce he could’ve been swinging with a toothpick and still went yard:

Take your time on that trot a little more, Alex. Jesus.