Sly Fox Rifles Through A Golfer's Bag And Takes Off With His Wallet
“Oh look how cute that little fox is. Adorable. So weird that he’s cool with being that close to people. Hey wait a second. Why is he getting so close to my bag? Get outta there NO! MY WALLET! MY PANERA PUNCH CARD IS IN THERE AND I’M ONLY ONE AWAY FROM A FREE BOWL OF BROCCOLI CHEDDAR SOUP!”
Snatch and run fool! That’d be a hard one to explain at the DMV. Yeah hey I need a new ID because I was drunk and golfing with my friends and a fox took off with it. True story. If you were to say that to them they would 1000% mark you as “suspicious” and put you on the “likely giving out fake IDs to teenagers” list if that list even exists. I think it does. Luckily the little guy dropped it before he got away. Criminal-minded fox though. Forget the tees. Forget the golf balls. Forget the cans of chew. Go straight for the wallet. Mugging 101. Money be green.