I Am Scared How Much Everyone Loves The Giants Draft

Goddammit man. As a fan of a struggling team, seeing that graphic of names should get me so hyped about the upcoming NFL season that I forget last season was an unrelenting nightmare from start to finish. My dumb football fan brain should forget all the pain as I look toward the future like someone who is looking to pop out another kid no matter what carnage happened in the delivery room during the last baby.

To make matters worse, everybody fucking LOVES the Giants draft from people who have "draft analysts" as their actual job title to usually negative fans on Reddit to our very own football robot Steven Cheah. The Giants have been scooping up more A's than Will Hunting did in grade school before he stopped trying in life.

Again, that type of love should be a good thing. However, I have been blogging the Giants here at Barstool for a decade now and know exactly how these things work. The more I like a draft, the worse it usually is. I have been called many things in my life. Unrelentingly charming, devastatingly handsome, morbidly obese. But I have never been called a sound talent evaluator for American Football. Which is why I am always skeptical when I absolutely love a team's draft board from start to finish (unless it's the Ravens or Eagles who always seem to have the perfect players fall right to their pick EVERY SINGLE YEAR). 

I remember when many of the same people that were excited about this year's draft were praising Dave Gettleman for trading down for the first time ever and collecting a future first rounder for next year, while ignoring that he allowed an absolute monster in Micah Parsons to go to a division rival while doing so. That future first round pick also became Evan Neal, who has been a flat out bust for the Giants and got his 5th year option declined during the draft.

Still though, it's impossible to overlook how good this Giants draft appears on digital Twitter paper. The Giants got perhaps the best player in the whole draft that can disrupt the entire game at 3, made a reasonable trade to move up and get a QB that has the physical tools as well as personality that can lead fans to blindly believe in their team actually hitting on a franchise QB, two talented players in the trenches that filled a glaring need, and of course Cam motherfucking Skattebo who was pretty much created in a lab for football fans to love.

I also have been doing this long enough to blindly talk myself into even the 7th round picks being studs based on things like Korie Black's incredible speed and Thomas Fidone being better than Brock Bowers before two ACL injuries knocked him down a peg at Nebraska.

So yeah, fuck it, I'm all in again like a goddamn idiot because what's the point of being a fan if you aren't going to believe in good things happening to your team? This draft is going to go down in the history books as the one that saved Joe Schoen's reputation, Brian Daboll's job, and the New York Giants franchise as a whole. 

*I do however reserve the right to change my opinion based on the numbers they choose since that is maybe the most important part of the entire draft process (Carter isn't touching 56 or 11 but needs something strong, Dart needs to stay away from weird QB numbers, and Skattebo should be either 34 or 44 since 40 is retired which may be a good thing for the NFL since that wearing it might've changed Cam instantly into a Big Blue Mike Alstott).