The Perfect Saint Patrick's Day Gift Doesn't Exi...

I don't know if your family celebrates Saint Paddy's Day, but mine does.

"But Large, that's not even a real Irish holiday."

Oh, yeah?… Well, I don't give a fuck.

So on the morning of every March 17th, before I head off to McSorley's, my immediate family (no inlaws) exchange gifts over a traditional Irish breakfast. 

Those gifts are usually Celtic-themed trinkets… Nothing big… Maybe a new kilt for the wooden bear on my porch…

Just a little something to commemorate that glorious day in 1936 when St Patrick kicked all of the Italians out of Ireland.

This year, I was struggling to find something a little different to give to my dad, and on a recent trip to London, I stumbled upon this beauty…

For those who don't know, a traditional Claddagh ring is made up of two hands holding a heart that has a crown sitting atop it. 

PicturePartners. Getty Images.

It's a simple design filled with symbolism: The heart represents love, the crown stands for loyalty, and those two clasped hands symbolize friendship. They were first produced in the 17th century in Claddagh, County Galway, and just about every Irishman has had one at some point in his life.

JFK, Jim Morrison, John Wayne, Ronald Reagan, Daniel Day-Lewis, Walt Disney, and Bill Clinton have all worn them… I think Monica Lewinsky still has Bill's ring stuck waaaaay up in the furthest reaches of her cervix. 

I have been given Claddaghs on multiple occasions in my life but never wore one with any regularity, but I think that might change with his bad boy. 

And the unwritten rules that apply to wearing a Claddagh ring can be tweaked slightly to fit the spirit of this iteration… With a traditional ring, you wear it with the heart pointing inward to symbolize that you are either married or in a relationship. or you wear it with the heart pointing out to symbolize that your single and ready to mingle.

Similarly, with this new design, the way you point the pint has meaning… By pointing the pint out, it symbolizes that you are drunk while wearing it pointed inward is showing that your glass is ready to be re-filled.

I don't recommend it, but if you look at this jewelry maker's profile more closely, you'll probably notice that her politics do not align with mine. However, I'd like to think we can put all of our differences aside just this once and celebrate shiny things that glorify my people's love of alcohol.

I know I am early on this, but Happy St Patrick's Day, and GO IRISH.

Take a report. 

-Large

If you're in the East Village on March 17th, this is where I'll be…

TAR

-L