The Best Strip Club In West Virginia Has Been Revealed And It's Dangerous

Listen, folks, I’ve seen some things in my day. As a Marine, I’ve traveled the world, lived through chaos, and experienced moments that would leave most men trembling (not really. Im kind of a pussy now). But nothing—and I mean nothing—prepared me for the absolute marvel that is Dangerous Curves, a NASCAR-themed strip club tucked away in the hills of Wheeling West Virginia.

West Virginia gets a bad rap sometimes. And sure, maybe that's because the Mountain State struggles to climb out of last place in a few almost meaningful categories. West Virginia sadly ranks dead ass last in measures like obesity rates (fatsos), life expectancy (staying alive passed 65), and access to quality healthcare (thanks obama). The state also struggles with poverty, regularly hoverin near the bottom in household income and job opportunities. Education isn’t great either, with West Virginia typically placing last in college attainment rates and test scores. YIKES!

You could focus on that but let me tell you, the fine folks in this state have achieved something truly groundbreaking that cant be measured by things like polls, results, actual outcomes, or governmental projections: West Virginia leads the United States in the rare but incredible business industries that combine the high-octane thrills of NASCAR with the timeless art of exotic dance. Horny on high octane!

People often forget it but strippers are athletes in their own right. I know SCE (strip club enthusiasts) will talk about New York, Montreal, and Tampa Bay as the capitols of the Western world, but the dancers at Dangerous Curves would like a word. No other strip location incorporates pit-stop precision into their routines. There’s nothing quite like watching a woman named Bobbi Flabonte or Whale Earnhart slide down a pole with the speed and grace of Kevin Harvthicc taking the final turn at The Daytona 500-lb Life . Inspiring! And don’t even get me started on the slick track tradition—it’s their signature move and involves a bottle of motor oil and bare breasts. Intrigued? You should be. 

At least I thought that's what Dangerous Curves was like the first time I watched ReDiscovering America- the theme. Turns out that Nick and KB are just a bunch of lying badboys.  

If you want to know the rest of the stuff they could or could not be telling the truth about, watch the newest episode of Drop A Pin!