Terrible Criminals Thwarted in Classic, "Put-On-a-Bear-Costume-And-Fuck-Up-Your-Rolls Royce-For-Insurance-Money" Scam

Dexerto - Four people have been arrested and charged with insurance fraud after they submitted an alleged fake video of a bear attacking three of their high-dollar cars.

According to a press release from the California Department of Insurance, the four Los Angeles residents allegedly committed insurance fraud by claiming a bear had attacked their cars, causing extensive damage in the process. 

The department began investigating the claims after the initial insurance company suspected fraud, even though there is a video of the alleged bear attacking a 2010 Rolls Royce Ghost. During the investigation, they determined that the bear was actually a human in a bear costume. 

Detectives also found two other insurance claims with other companies made by suspects claiming that they also faced damages to their Mercedes from a bear in the same location. The department stated that a video was provided with those claims as well, but they were certain it was a human in a bear costume again. 

As far as scammers go, I don't have too much of a moral qualm when it comes to ripping off insurance companies. Insurance companies are a scam in their own right. With the amount of money I've paid in car insurance over the course of my life without ever getting in an accident, Progressive should write me a check. I'm essentially paying for Flo to get a fresh bob every month. But what insurance scammers always seem to underestimate is how great of lengths insurance companies will go to not pay out on a claim. I'm sure these scammers thought they could simply drop half-a-grand on some Kitchen Mama Meat Shredder Claws + a lifelike Grizzly Bear costume...

…park their luxury vehicles in view of the driveway camera, crawl around them bearishly in the middle of the night, make some preposterously fake looking scratches on the interior…

…then submit the claim and an under-appreciated employee who hates their job would sign off on a new upholstering without batting an eye. They were probably trying to start a business. "Hey for a couple hundred bucks, I'll fuck up your car in a bear costume and your insurance company will redo the entire inside of your vehicle for free."

Or something very stupid and poorly thought out along those lines. They at least had a few more Rolls Royce's to scratch up. Because if it were only a three time thing, then they surely wouldn't have been stupid enough to not dispose of the bear costume, right?

They always forget that insurance companies will go to the ends of the earth to not pay up. They're not only looking for fraud. They're looking for any loophole under the sun so that you don't see a dime of the very slight, very negligible sum of money you rightfully deserve. And if they do suspect foul play in the form of a fake bear, they're going to get the California Department of Fish & Wildlife involved. The California Department of Fish & Wildlife is going to clock that bear as an obvious human-in-bear-suit. Investigators will show up at your home and pull an enormous lifelike bear costume out of your hallway closet. They're not just going to deny your claim either. That's fraud pal. They're going to sue you for as much as possible. With any luck, you'll be spending time behind bars.

The suspects racked up a massive $141,839 bill for the alleged fraud which could cost each suspect up to $50,000 and five years in state prison.

Egg on their face when the investigators uncovered the bear suit. Personally, I would have stopped taking my arthritis medication, got off the Ozempic, and ballooned up 50+ pounds to go full O.J. Simpson in court. Do the whole, "If the bear costume doesn't fit you must acquit" thing. But even with that, it would have taken a staff of dream team lawyers to get them off. They were caught bear handed. And considering these scammers went to such great lengths to cause damage that couldn't have resulted in THAT much of a payout… I'm going to go out on a limb and say they went with a public defender in this case. Maybe they can sell their now slightly damaged luxury vehicles to help pay the legal fees.

I like where your heads were at scammers. It is a very funny way to commit fraud. And if you're going to commit fraud, it might as well be hilarious. But I'm afraid as far as fraud goes, you guys are fucking horrible at it. Just awful. Honestly, you weren't even close. Anybody with eyes could see how fake those scratches were. We could all easily see how humanly that "bear" moved. And get rid of the damn bear costume next time. Be better scammers.