Surviving Barstool | New Episodes Tonight, Wednesday & Thursday 8PM ETTUNE IN

Jerry Jones Is Going To Have To Smack The Next Reporter Who Asks Him About The Cowboys Getting Their Ass Kicked By The Sun At AT&T Stadium


A frustrated Jerry Jones had some comments about the sun impacting play at AT&T Stadium: 

“By the way, we know where the sun is going to be when we decide to flip the coin or not. We do know where the damn sun is going to be in our own stadium.” 

Why not put up curtains over the windows? 

Jerry: “Well let’s tear the damn stadium down and build another one? Are you kidding me? 

“Everybody has got the same thing. Every team that comes in here has the same issues. 

“I’m saying, the world knows where the sun is. You get to know that almost a year in advance. Someone asked me about the sun. What about the sun? Where’s the moon?”

Home field advantage is one of the most coveted and sought after factors in sports. When you're playing in the NFL and the margins are so slim, you need to look for any possible edge you can gain over your opponent. 

But Jerry Jones is old school. He thinks home field advantage is for pussies. Why would you want to make things easier on yourself? Back in his day he'd have to walk 25 miles uphill both ways just to get to and from practice. If you want to be a champion, you need to challenge yourself. 

So if you can catch a pass in AT&T Stadium while the sun is searing your retinas and you can't see shit? You can catch a pass anywhere. Only issue for the Cowboys, however, is that they can't catch a pass in AT&T Stadium. 

Now you're probably thinking to yourself right now that there has to be some sort of logistical reason why the Cowboys don't have curtains they can just put up to block out the sun during games. Maybe you have to special order curtains that size, and they wouldn't come in before the end of the season or something. Which could be a valid excuse aside from the fact that they already have the curtains…

But if they put them up during Cowboys games, that would mean that Jerry Jones is admitting he's an absolute dipshit who built a $1B stadium directly in line with the sun at 4pm on Sundays in October-December. You think Jerry Jones is ever going to admit he got beat by the sun? The fucking sun? Get real. 

I'll admit that those were some incredible responses out of Jerry, though. "Well let’s tear the damn stadium down and build another one" after the mere mention of putting up curtains. Why spend a few hundred dollars on curtains to block out the sun so your $136 million receiver can catch touchdown passes when you could just build a whole new stadium. Also this line is just as good as it gets--"Someone asked me about the sun. What about the sun? Where’s the moon?". For some reason that "where's the moon" is taking me out. It's a valid point. Everybody is always bitching about the sun at AT&T Stadium, but nobody ever mentions how well the building is designed to block out the moon. Gotta give Jerry credit on that, but nobody ever wants to give the man the praise he deserves. Sad! 

P.S. -- Say what you want about how much of a piece of shit AT&T Stadium is, but photos like these rule. They are immaculate, and you'd never get them with curtains up in the stadium. Are photos like these really worth the Cowboys losing every game? One billion percent yes. 

Sam Hodde. Getty Images.

@JordieBarstool