Caitlin Clark Fans Are Predictably Losing Their Shit as ESPN Puts Angel Reese at the Top of Their Rookie Rankings

Emilee Chinn. Getty Images.

There are few things in this world that are certain. Every aspect of human endeavor involves some degree of doubt and healthy skepticism. But if there is one thing that we know with 100% confidence, it's that Caitlin Clark is the WNBA Rookie of the Year. 

You know it. I know it, and I only pay attention to the league for blogging purposes. The sportsbooks know it so well they've stopped taking wagers. And some remote colonies in the once-powerful ESPN empire know it:

The only one who doesn't appear to have caught on is the World Headquarters of the former World Wide Leader in Sports. Because they did a lot of heavy lifting to justify putting Angel Reese ahead of her in their rookie rankings:

Since it's behind a paywall, here's the free Sports Illustrated reporting on it:

Their reasoning for ranking Reese over Clark boiled down to advanced metrics. 

"Reese's narrow edge in PER comes from her stat totals like her numerous double-doubles; she has 22 (including a streak of 15 straight at one point), which is tied for the third most in a WNBA season, just six off of the Connecticut Sun's Alyssa Thomas' record from last season," ESPN's Neil Paine wrote. 

"And finally, Reese leads sizably over Clark in WS (win shares) because of individual efficiency ratings," the article continued. 

"On just the possessions she is responsible for, Reese is up 4 net points per 100 (104 offensive rating versus 100 defensive rating), while Clark is down 7 net points (101 offense, 108 defense). There are clear limitations to that approach, since it doesn't take into account usage rate -- Clark leads Reese, 26.5% to 22.0% -- but that is a major component of the WS formula, and thus a driving force behind the biggest aspect of our consensus average favoring Reese over Clark."

I'm an old, but I'm not a complete Luddite who hates advanced statistics. Analytics can serve a practical purpose, depending on how you use them. But to quote Winston Churchill, "There are lies, damned lies, and whatever the fuck alphabet soup of pure bullshit this, trying to disguise itself as analysis and disprove what everyone's eyes are telling them." 

Angel Reese is excellent. I mean, not at everything, obviously:

But the advanced stats geeks are making their analytics put in so much work to make this case they're in violation of a couple of dozen federal labor laws. Let's boil it down to the numbers that don't require explanation, obscure acronyms, or Stephen Hawking's brain to comprehend:

Reese per game: 13.6 points, 12.3 rebounds, and 1.7 assists

Clark per game: 17.8 points, 5.8 rebounds, and 8.3 assists 

There's no shame in Reese's stat line. I'm not passing myself off as a WNBA historian, since my knowledge of the league goes back months. But it wouldn't surprise me to learn Reese would be ROTY in any other season. It happens. Sometimes your Charles Barkley and have the misfortune of turning pro the same year as Michael Jordan. Or Karl Malone with Patrick Ewing. Or Magic Johnson and Larry Bird. But unless you really, really want those extra 6.5 rebounds, "PER" and whatever "RAPTOR" is, this isn't even a discussion. 

And this is going over with the legion of Clark fans - the ones who are buying tickets in record numbers, driving the TV ratings and putting the Association on the cultural map - about as well as you'd assume. ESPN woke the dragon on this one:

In a way, it's sad to see such a once respectable institution sink so low. Reduced to using some arcane statistical nonsense to prove a false premise just to troll for clicks like some lonely Flat Earther desperate for engagement. How the mighty have fallen. This is truly a lamentable, Ozymandias moment for the outlet that reinvented sports coverage so many years ago. Even worse, it's not surprising. It's as if this kind of content is the only way they can make noise in the crowded marketplace of ideas now. 

But they're going to learn some hard lessons instead. You can only push Caitlin Clark loyalists so far. And you should never sacrifice what little credibility you have left, just for a couple of clicks.