Congress is Finally Doing What We Pay Them For: Investigating Peru's Alien Mummies and Their Possible Link to UFOs

Fotoholica Press. Getty Images.

On the US Senate's official website, it explain in no uncertain terms what the Legislative Branch of the federal government's role is:

[T]he United States Constitution is the world’s longest surviving written charter of government. Its first three words – “We The People” – affirm that the government of the United States exists to serve its citizens. The supremacy of the people through their elected representatives is recognized in Article I.

To use Willy Wonka's words, it's all there. Black and white. Clear as crystal. "To serve its citizens." Nothing in there about selling out their country, doing insider trading, making themselves rich, giving cushy jobs to their friends and relatives, and getting Honey Trapped by prostitutes working for foreign agencies. "The supremacy of the people" is right there in the very first Article. 

And speaking for the rest of my fellow citizens, what the supreme people want more than anything is an answer to the greatest question humanity faces: The nature and existence of UFO and aliens. We the People are starving for information. And all we've gotten so far out of these shameless kleptocrats we pay - this Parliament of Whores - is a few bread crumbs. 

But there is hope. Because it's quite possible they're finally going to get us the answers we deserve on the burning issue of our day, Peruvian Alien Mummies:

Source - Peru's famous 'alien mummies' are set for the US, where Congress has pledged to crack the mysterious cases once and for all. 

Republican Tim Burchett, known for his outspoken criticism of the US government's UFO secrecy, vowed to assemble 'the most important people in the world' to examine the bodies, which some scientists claim harbor '30 percent unknown' DNA.

The congressman said he would initiate this new analysis at the University of Tennessee, Knoxville in his home state.

The team at Tennessee have obtained half-a-million dollars from the Department of Justice late last year to better understand skeletal remains and 'relic DNA.' 

Though Rep. Burchett has not called the bodies 'alien' yet, his plan is sure to spark furor akin to the firestorm that accompanied the mummies' debut before Mexico's Congress last September. 

The Republican lawmaker made his pledge to veteran Mexican broadcast journalist and prolific UFO researcher Jaime Maussan in a new interview, which aired Monday. 

'I will gladly help you,' Rep. Burchett said. …

Both projects could bring forensic anthropology's latest tech and methodology to bear on the elusive origins of Maussan's now seven-and-counting, 'tridactyl' mummies, which the UFO researcher maintains could be extraterrestrial. 

Maussan, whose research has courted controversy for nearly a decade, has floated the idea that the mummies might be alien-human 'hybrids' — and he's now suing Peru's government for the right to ship the bodies to more advanced labs in the US.

Now, even the most naive, optimistic, trusting soul in the world would have to point out that while Rep. Burchett has vowed to "assemble 'the most important people in the world'" to get to the bottom of the mystery of these mummified humanoid remains, like the Nick Fury of UFOlogists, he just happened to find them at the university of his home state. It's not being cynical to point out that with 7 billion people in the world, his idea of "the best" are his own constituents, it's being realistic. That's either a wild coincidence or just another example of an elected official buying support with taxpayer money. And it's not hard to figure out which. 

Still, despite this seeming like just another crass power grab among the thousands these solons do every day, maybe some good will come of it. Perhaps these Tennessee Vols at the research lab will find the "relic DNA" they're looking for. And that it can't possibly be of terrestrial origin. If nothing else, maybe getting these skeletal remains into the US and presenting them in Congress and putting their existence on the record will, in fact, "spark the furor" Burchett is looking for. And in doing so, move the football just a few more inches ahead and get us closer to the answers we seek.

It seems like a pipe dream. And if I was a better man, I'd put my money on this being just another dead end. Another half million dollars flushed down the shitter of what should be the greatest investigation in the history of humankind. I hope I'm wrong. It's just that when you assume the federal government is just playing us and has no real interest in revealing the truth, you find yourself being right 100% of the time.