What are the Most Pointless Inventions?
If you were too distracted by the dashing young fellow all the way to the right, a voicemail we got on KFC Radio this week asked the question “What’s the most pointless invention?”. The gentleman who left the voicemail threw out toilets that flush automatically as his pick…thinks they’re too flush happy. Personally? I don’t hate a little spritz on the backside when I’m in the heat of battle on the porcelain. There are much shittier (get it?) pointless inventions out there.
I really don't get lights that turn off automatically. They’re pointless in any room but actually cause a pressing issue in bathrooms. Every once in a while things take a turn for the worst in there and your visit ends up taking a little longer than expected, then all of a sudden…darkness. The last thing I want to do in that moment is rise up from my battle position and flail around like an idiot to trigger the light. The worst part about them is it’s never the places that could benefit from them to save a little extra cash. It’s not the mom and pop shop up the street that has them (they have morals). The place I run into this issue the most is my college which I can assure you does not need to save the dollars it is by automatically switching the lights off while I’m fighting for my life*.
Siri has been a huge dud too. Played up as the future when she was released but what has she done for us lately? Misunderstand what we say? Interrupt a banger of a song for no reason? She’s the Anthony Bennett of Apple innovations and we haven’t talked about it enough. The only time I’ve heard her voice in the past 5 years is when I accidentally summon her.
Bonus BEST invention:
There’s maybe nothing that’s had as much of a net positive impact in life as the voice-controlled TV remote has (Take some fucking notes, Siri). It only really shows its powers once a year but my appreciation for it renews every March when I don’t have to scroll through the channels looking for TruTV.
*If the money saved can get a 5 star recruit on the hardwood at Providence College I take back literally everything I said. Shoutout Kim English #Mindset.
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