The NBA Champion Boston Celtics Are Somehow Operating With An Endless Supply Of Money After Extending Sam Hauser To A New 4 Year/$45M Deal

Grace Beal. Getty Images.

Alright, by now you know the drill. Everyone man their battle stations....

....ready?

BRRRRAAAAADDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!

Sweet mother of God did Brad Stevens do it again or did Brad Stevens do it again? Here's a hint.

Brad Stevens did it again.

All summer I've heard these other team's GMs talk about how devastating the 2nd apron of the new CBA is and how as a result it meant that their hands were tied when it came to paying to keep their own players, even if it meant losing someone valuable. That was just the reality of today's NBA we were told.

Meanwhile, I'm watching Brad Stevens do this without a care in the world

Let's just recap what we've seen our lord and savior do since the start of the postseason

- He forked over a 4/135M extension to Jrue Holiday in early April, it immediately paid dividends on their way to the title

- Luke Kornet kicked off free agency with a new 1/2M deal

- Xavier Tillman decided to stay on a 2 year minimum deal

- Jayson Tatum got his no brainer 5/315M extension

- Derrick White got his no brainer 4/125M extension

- Sam Hauser got his 4/45M extension

Let's just add that all up shall we? Without factoring in the tax penalties, that's around $624M in contracts alone. Not only are the NBA Champion Boston Celtics bringing back 13 of their 15 roster spots from last season, their top 8 rotation is now all locked into multiyear deals. Meanwhile, their competition is losing valuable rotation players left and right.

Many people will wonder how this is possible when no other team seems to be able to act this way. The answer is pretty simple in my opinion. Brad and his team did the work early and got all these guys in the system before the new CBA which was huge because it allows them to use their Bird Rights, and the most important part is the Celts are not operating like a bunch of broke bitches. Wyc is selling this team for what should end up being at least $6B, so you know what that means? Everyone gets an extension!!

At some point, the tax bill will come due, and you saw the number. A cool $210M on top of a salary number that's already $225M. Whatever! Not my money! If this means I have to bow down to my new Saudi oil money overlords, then so be it. All I care about is this team maximizing the opportunity that is in front of them, and in case you've forgotten what that is I'd love to remind you

Brian Babineau. Getty Images.

Now in terms of Sam Hauser? Is it crazy to suggest Brad got him at a discount here? 4/45M is all it took for a lifetime 40% three point shooter who had multiple possessions where he had both Luka Doncic and Kyrie Irving in jail defensively during the Finals? Brad Stevens you beautiful sonofabitch!

From undrafted to an NBA champion and now a $45M dollar extension. What a story. It was always sort of a cheat code that the Celts were getting this type of production from Hauser while paying him minimum money, so I'm happy for him that not only does he get to cash in, but he also gets to keep being a part of this thing moving forward.

Now, if the day comes when decisions need to be made, Hauser's salary number is now important. Everything the Celts do will now have to match dollar for dollar in trades and they can't aggregate contracts, so having another mid-sized salary on the books is important moving forward, even if it comes with a massive tax bill. Again, the oil money will cover that part. 

In a summer that has been nothing but complete bliss ever since June 17th, every day seems to be better than the last. I'll be honest, I can't really believe this is our life right now. Not only did the Celts reach the top of the mountain, but they've re-loaded with a great chance to do it again….and again….and again.

Brad Stevens man. What a legend.