Cubs Pitcher Lands On 60 Day-IL After Punching The Dugout Wall Because He Fucking Stinks

Finally somebody in the dugout is willing to get mad. And at the same time, of course he's a complete moron. We can't even get a decent metldown without an IL visit. That's how much the bullpen sucks this year. Guys don't even know how to express themselves without compromising the depth chart.  Makes me sick to my stomach. 

State Farm deserves better. 

Quinn Harris. Getty Images.

Seriously. State Farm rocks. I'm not trying to start an insurance war here the Sunday after July 4th but I will if you make me. 

Point is Colten Brewer isn't good enough to be punching the wall. That's point 1. 

Number 2. If you're going to get pissed, don't get hurt

Finally and most important. Be sensational. Carlos Zambrano was sensational. This is a huge difference between being a legend and being a twat

Zambrano was awesome. I would do anything to get his bat in this lineup right now and I meant right now before this Angels game 3. This lifeless pile of shit lineup needs a spark and I'm inclined to say Big Z can light it. 

Or in other words, it can't possibly get much worse than whatever the hell they've done up to this point. Couple other things: 

- Boog sucks 

- Today's a real Broadcast with the girls in the booth. Should be a good one. That's a fun bunch and I like the word fun.

- Craig Counsell also sucks 

- If the Cubs lose today's game then I think we need to have a serious conversation about trading half the roster and starting over the best we can. That's how bad it is when you lose 7-0 to one of baseball's worst teams in one of the biggest spots of the year. 

- Even so you can't break your hand on a state farm logo just because you suck at throwing MLB pitches 

- Of all Cubs injuries, this is stupid but far from remarkable. Sosa blew a back on a sneeze. Kerry Wood lost a fight with a hot tub. But has anything ever been more bizarre, ever, then Mark Prior's shattered elbow? 

- Yes in fact there's another Mark Prior injury that haunts my dreams as they combined to ruin a 10-year Cubs dynasty. But that's a different blog given the nature of this injury. 

Anyways Colten Brewer is a moron but at least he gets mad like a lot of us. 

And that's because we fuckin stink.