The Giants New Alternate Jerseys Are So Putrid, Ugly And Hideous That They Are Actually Perfect And Will Trick Our Dumb Brains If We Suck

I think of 2 things when I see these bad boys. First, the Montreal Canadians. 

Denis Brodeur. Getty Images.

Second, Clint Dempsey scoring goals for the USA. 

Michael Steele. Getty Images.

Every single person out there is talking about how they are hideous. They might be. I think we're wearing khakis? But the fact that everyone is starting to hate them is only going to make me love them. They are so bad that they might be perfect. Plus it will trick our dumb brains watching them, especially if we suck again. Not to mention, are they really worse than the previous red alternate jerseys we had? 

Jim McIsaac. Getty Images.

Again, the real issue is the fact the Giants don't wear these every single game.

Al Bello. Getty Images.

Cooper Neill. Getty Images.

Those are the perfect jerseys. These new red ones? So goddamn hideous that they are beautiful. I don't know what to tell you. When something is so bad, they become great. That's where we are with these Century Red jerseys. Not to mention they aren't boring. Everyone has boring jerseys now, I want to mix it up from time to time. Oh you broke out a black alternate jersey? How unique! I'm willing to stand up to the internet here, they are fine. They are disgusting, but they are fine. 

I just wish we wore them all season to really break some brains.