Twitter Finance Influencer Goes Viral For A Feel Good Story About A Pizzeria That He Calls The "Dave Portnoy Effect"

This post has been going viral on Twitter over the last 24 hours and at first I genuinely thought this was one of those AI finance Twitter accounts that just uses buzz words for numbies. I don't know if we have this guy on payroll, but maybe we should consider it because he wrote the most just and beautiful written word potentially in history. I genuinely thought he used ChatGPT the way he strung sentences together like prime Hemingway. He wrote so eloquently that even Bss1234561 took notice to it:

I did love the part where he talked about how Portnoy donates his money and raises it for good causes instead of having a building named after him at Harvard. Imagine the Portnoy School Of Social Media at Michigan? I know nothing about nothing as Dave would say but my suspicion is he would never do something like that .. but tell me why that sounds kinda fire? Imagine the fellas posted up in front of the Portnoy school? It could be the new SAFTB flag.

Anywho, everyone loves a nice feel-good story, so call me a glazer or whatever the kids do these days but this Shakespearean piece did nearly bring a tear to my eye. Replace Dave with any human on Earth in this same context and it's just as beautiful of a truly fulfilled American dream.

I will say my biggest regret of this story is not getting my word in yesterday like Large, who first and foremost is a renowned food critic unlike any we have at Barstool, but also knows when it's time to capitalize and get some followers too:

Well played Large.

P.S. I may stop watching sports after this section of that post: