Enough Is Enough. We Desperately Need To Stop Releasing These Super Bowl Commercials So Early
As I'm sure the majority of you have already seen at this point, Paramount+ went ahead and put together one of the best Super Bowl commercials of the decade. If they decided to turn around and make an entire film based on this 2-minute clip, I'd be the first person waiting in line to see it in theaters on release night.
It's complete and total perfection. It's everything that art should be. There's not a single wasted second during the entire thing. The moment Drew Barrymore starts blabbering on about not throwing a child, I figured the commercial was finally going to be losing me a little. I was fearful it hit a lull just 30 seconds in. And then BOOM, Sir Patrick Stewart speaks for all of us with a "Barrymore, shut your face!". Tua not able to perform in the cold, Creed blasting in the background, it's got everything.
And that's the issue. It's everything that makes Super Bowl commercials great, and we're here watching it on our phones on February 2nd.
I don't know if it's the consumer's fault or major corporations. All I know is that greed has stripped us of yet another sacred staple of American culture. First it was Christmas completely overtaking Thanksgiving. Now it's getting all the great Super Bowl commercials out a full week in advance before the game. It's a goddamn shame is what it is. This is the type of commercial you need to witness for the first time surrounded by a bunch of friends in a living room all scarfing down some buffalo chicken dip. Not while you're on your phone while taking a shit at work.
Hopefully this commercial is SO good that it wakes people up, and we finally say enough is enough. Give us the Super Bowl commercials during the Super Bowl. If you need to give a quick 15-second teaser a week ahead of time, fine. I'll take it. But a full 2-minute release of what is arguably the best short film of the year? I need to watch that while my hands are covered in wing sauce and debating on whether I should destroy my buddy's bathroom or not. That's the American way.