Congrats! Alaska Airlines Is Offering $1,500 To Every Person Who Survived The Flight Where A Door Plug Flew Off The Plane At 16,000 Feet In The Air

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Now I'm seeing Alaska Airlines is offering $1,500 for everyone who survived the flight. Gotta admit, I sort of respect the fuck you attitude. We all make fun of airlines and everything that goes along with flying but this is the first time I can recall an airline really leaning into being a shitbag. I mean imagine surviving a flight where a DOOR flies off. Just a gigantic hole as your stuck in this tube 16,000 feet in the air. We use nightmare fuel and everything like that too much these days, but that's the top of the list. I'm not afraid of flying by any means, but that's under the assumption the plane doesn't lose a door or a window or anything. 

I'd love to see the reaction of the people being offered $1,500 AND a refund on their ticket. Gotta throw that in there so you know Alaska Airlines means business. Did they laugh? Did they scream? How quick did they call a lawyer and get ready to sue for more, because that's a guarantee. I assume this is just like doing business with Scott Boras back in the day. You know you're fucked the moment that Boras started calling you. 

Feel like there's an unwritten contract between people and airlines. It's obviously get me to point A to point B as fast and safe as possible. In return, we won't act like assholes. You can say that we break the second part quite often, in fact too often. But those people simply shouldn't be allowed to fly. You act like a dickhead on a plane and you're banned, make it a 3 strike penalty for all I care. But the moment you lose a door in the air, you can't cut me a check or give me a gift card for $1,500. I'm immediately going into Kramer mode and calling the best lawyer I know.