Live EventThe Unnamed Show With Dave Portnoy, Kirk Minihane, Ryan Whitney - Episode 35Watch Now
Live EventBarstool Sports Picks Central | Thursday, November 14th, 2024Watch Now
Stella Blue Coffee Golden Mug Giveaway | Enter to Win One of 10 PS5s LEARN MORE

The Patriots Hit Rock Bottom on a Thursday Night in Which They Didn't Play

I said a while ago - and a while before that - how the 2023 Patriots have broken me to the point I'm rooting for every ill that can befall a team to happen to this one, this year. That I want a host of Old Testament style plagues to descend upon this team. For the football gods to use every club in their bag to beat this team to its knees. To exact their vengeance for whatever has angered them. To pay a penance for 20 years of success and arrogance. 

And with the exception of an improbable win at Pittsburgh a week ago, I've been getting my wish. Of their 10 losses, seven have been by one score or less. Dropped passes, interceptions and fumbles have cost them chances late in pretty much all seven. They've lost their top two defensive players for the season, and their top offensive player is hurt and not likely to return. And that's barely skimming the surface of the apocalypse this once mighty franchise has suffered. 

But if you really want to be a masochist about all this - and I've been all about putting on the Gimp suit and climbing into the trunk in the back room at Zed's pawn shop - the Chargers-Raiders game was an all you can eat buffet of delicious suffering. It represents the lowest of low points in a season full of them. 

First, here's the list of former Patriots in this one:

Jakobi Meyers:

Receiving: 2 catches, 32 yards, 1 touchdown

Passing: 2 attempts, 2 completions, 12 yards, 1 touchdown

Brandon Bolden:

Rushing: 2 attempts, 25 yards, 1 touchdown

Jack Jones:

4 tackles, 1 assist, 1 interception, a Pick-6 touchdown

That's three scores from players the Patriots brought into the league and decided they no longer have use for. And as a result, this is the  stat lines between the Raiders last night and the Patriots two weeks ago, against this same Chargers team:

Las Vegas, Week 15:

63 points, 378 total yards, 254 passing yards, 6.0 yards per play, 1 sack allowed for -6 yards, 20 1st downs, 9-16 on 3rd down conversions

New England, Week 13:

0 points, 257 total yards, 109 passing yards, 4.0 yards per play, 5 sacks allowed for -32 yards, 13 1st downs, 4-14 on 3rd down conversions, 1-3 on 4th down conversions

Both teams facing the Chargers. Both at home. And with the Raiders starting a rookie 4th round quarterback who started the year third on their depth chart. And Aidan O'Connell had more passing touchdowns (four) than the Patriots had in a five game stretch from the second Miami game in October to the Chargers game on December 3rd. Hell, Meyers passing touchdown alone was a many as the Pats had in a four game stretch in Weeks 3-6. 

So once again I can't help but to steer into the skid. Enjoy the humiliation. Embrace that sweet, sweet pain and make a fetish out of it. Insane as it sounds, it's the only rational approach to a season that stopped making any sense months ago.

Giphy Images.

And as we brace ourselves for a potential end to the Belichick Era, keep these performances by guys he gave up on and these numbers just two weeks apart as justification for making a change. Because there's no way on God's green Earth this could happen unless something has gone seriously, seriously wrong with the direction of this franchise.

Jalen Mills certainly seems to agree: