The OFFICIAL List of Top 100 College Football Personalities Has Been Released, and Barstool Sports CLEANED UP
Congratulations are in order for Barstool Sports own Brandon Walker. Nobody at Barstool Sports in the world of media deserves it more than Brandon. He knows college football like the back of his hand. He knew the exact 4 teams the college football committee would accept. . And in his award accepting TikTok, he doesn't look anything like that one unfortunate picture I had taken of myself last year.
You can't argue with Big Game Boomer. The man knows CFB. People have long said he's one of the 100 best ball knowers in the world. He was recently named the 98th best College Football Personality on Twitter.
Now when some people read this list, they might say things like, "Lmao fuck off dude" or "The meat riding is crazzyy bro." or "Big Game Boomer just knows that Barstool Sports is full of ego-maniacs who will automatically retweet any sort of content that mentions them in the slightest way and I'll get way more views." ……………..
Anyways. Let's review all of the Barstool Sports personalities who made the list:
6. Dave Portnoy (Michigan): A well-known college football aficionado. You could argue that Dave Portnoy wouldn't recognize the name of more than 5 current day College Football players if you showed him pictures of their faces, but you'd be wrong. I bet he could get 10-15. And be honest, how many college football players could you name by face? You don't know faces you just know last names, team, and general skin tone. But that's irrelevant. Dave is a gut guy. The rest of these names on the list are nerds who watch games critically, and mull over the details like fucking nerds, and use statistics like nerds to help formulate their college football opinions. But Dave goes off instinct. That's what makes him different from these other losers. Not everybody can be bogged down in facts, and that's what makes Dave unique. Viva.
7, Will Compton (Nebraska): Retired NFL football player. Got bullied into retirement by me and $71 worth of donuts..
12. Big Cat (Wisconsin): Everybody who understands entertainment knows how incredible Dan is. People who think opposite of him are going to look back and realize how sensational of a media personality @BarstoolBigCat truly is, and realize there’s never going to be anyone remotely close to how entertaining he is. Not only himself but many others truly changed the online media space over the last decade and it’s unreal to get to see in person as history occurs.
21. Kayce Smith (Texas A&M): - #1 female CFB personality on the list behind Alyssa Lang and Molly McGrath (also Nicole Auerbach)
46. Pat McAfee (West Virginia) - Did you see him go on First Take today in his tank top and be like, "Everyone hates me because I got half of ESPN fired so go to hell." What loose cannon.
58. Megan M. Money (LSU): Sup, Megan
66. Jack McGuire (Fordham): I'm trying to think of something that's not a January 6th joke because that's low hanging fruit and played out and quite frankly not based in fact. If I can come up with something better by the time this gets posted at 10am I'll change this.
74. Taylor Lewan (Michigan): Barstool Sports foremost personality championing the scrappy underdog Michigan Wolverines against national powerhouse/overwhelming favorite the Alabama Crimson Tide.
76. David Blattman (Arizona): Barstool Sports preeminent Arizona Wildcats fan & go to place for real time Surviving Barstool tweets. Blattman comes in 11 spots higher than Tim Tebow.
81. Double Vodka Don (Ohio State): I'm always stuck between feeling bad for DVD (i.e. Big Ev) for all the shit he takes from Dave as an Ohio State fan, or being jealous because you know that being Dave's punching bag gives him a job for life.
97. Dana Beers (Cincinnati): Can't believe he didn't come in higher TBH
Notable Omissions:
Ben Mintz (Ole Miss/LSU): The un-cancellable 2x host of Wake Up Mintzy. The #1 watch salesman in the history of Brick Watches. Speed Demon. A man of exercise and fitness. Overall knower of all things college football. The fact that Mintzy was left off this list is disgusting
Rico Bosco (San Diego St.): I reached out to Big Game Boomer himself, and he told me he refuses to include a College Football Media Personality with a series of 50 burgers on their resume
Good list Boomer. You're doing great.