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Ranking The Greatest GIFs In The History Of The Internet

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Let's get one thing straight before we commence: if you prounce GIF as "JIF" like the peanut butter, you're an asshole, I hate you, and I wish all the bad things in the world on you and nobody else but...

...you.

Glad we got out of the way.

*NOTE* these are not my draft picks. I'm not spoiling SHIT. Obviously there's a chance I got none of these, let alone all. On that note, let's rank my favorite 5 GIFs in internet history: 

5. Kobe Bryant DUNKED ON!!! 

Giphy Images.

I first discovered this GIF back in 2015 after getting blackout drunk on a school night in celebration of the Blackhawks winning the Stanley Cup. I don't often experience sports joy, so in the rare times I do I have to rub it in losers like KFC's face. 

That's where Clem chimed in with the greatest GIF drop of all time: 

That skinny fat loser KFC was right - there was nothing he could do. He was legitimately ethered, immasculated and dunked on and all of that was appropriately reflected in Clem's GIF response. 

4. Homer Simpson bushes: 

Giphy Images.

Self explanatory. Walk into an online conversation that all of a sudden became overly political, racist, sexist, or some other sort of "ist"? Boom, hit them with the "Homer bushes" GIF and you're excused from the conversation from that point forward. 

3. Blinking Guy:

Giphy Images.

Also self explanatory. Sometimes you're perusing around the timeline and you see some porn bot reply to you that she wants you to double stuff her backside in Backdoor Sluts 10. Although it sounds enticing, you've been on the internet a long time. You know you can't fall into the trap. 

Boom, "blinking guy" GIF "her" into Bolivian 

2. Chapelle "Black Bush": 

This might be my favorite GIF simply for the fact that it's an internet get out of jail free card. Have you ever though to yourself, "Gee, I'd really like to express my opinion on (X) subject, but feel like since my opinion differs from that of others, my thoughts may be met with malcontent from the internet masses"? 

Well the next time you think that just add this GIF to the Tweet. Boom, problem solved. You've fired your "take" off, but admitted you know it's crazy and won't be entertaining further discussion via Black Bush aka Dave Chapelle. 

It's perfect, actually 

1. Trump WRONG against Hilldog at the 2016 debates:

Giphy Images.

Neededless to say, we have to go with everyone's favorite internet persona, #45 Donald Trump. In a sea of a million great DT GIFS, this is my favorite. It's just SO goddamn condescending to send to someone, and making condescending comments at people is manly and makes me feel good about myself. 

On the flip side, I'd like anyone who hits me with the DT WRONG GIF to stub their toe. The other obvious heavy hitter was this: 

Giphy Images.

All of em are laugh out loud funny and perfectly funny internet GIFs. 

I know there are a billion that could be argued for a top 5. After careful deliberation, these are mine. The masses are now allowed to discuss amongst themselves but not until you subscribe to Barstool Chicago on YouTube: