Live EventBarstool Sports Picks Central | Tuesday, November 5th, 2024Watch Now

High School "Satan Club" Awarded $200k, Allowed To Meet On Middle School Property

Huge week for the Devil. Biggest Devil week I can remember since I started working here. Just this morning, a video surfaced of a woman undoubtedly possessed by Satan on a Frontier Airlines flight.

Devil 1 - God 0

But that was far from the Devil's only W this week. The prestigious 'After School Satan Club' of the Saucon Valley School District in Pennsylvania dunked on the god-loving heathens who've worked so tireless to shut them down.

NY Post - An eastern Pennsylvania school district has agreed to fork out $200,000 to settle a discrimination lawsuit from The Satanic Temple — and allow students to attend controversial After School Satan Club meetings on school facilities.

The Saucon Valley School District agreed to pay $200,000 in attorney’s fees while vowing to provide the club with the same access to campuses as other organizations get, despite previous fiery protests.

I'm sorry, I though this was America? I thought we lived in a free country? Freedom of religion and all that shit. How dare anybody try to yuck Satan's yum. If a group of totally innocent and not-at-all concerning high school students want to meet together on school property in the name of Satan, then who are we to tell them no? What's the difference between a group of nerds gathering in the school cafeteria for an hour of mediocre chess, and a group of kids in all black who idolize who world has unanimously agreed represents all of the bad things in the world all in one entity? Why shouldn't Mrs. Jordan let them conjure in her 7th grade science class at 3:45pm every Thursday?

Plus, they have a cute little slogan. "Educatin' with Satan". And look how adorable their logo is.

Although I will say… I don't think these kids aren't true Satan heads. This particular after-school Satan club is kind of half-assing their devil worship. To say they're fully embracing everything that Satan represents would be a slap in the face to all the true fire & brimstone Satan worshipers out there (Son of Sam, etc.)

Despite its name, The Satanic Temple actually has nothing to do with fire and brimstone or worshipping the devil.

Rather, it claims to utilize Satanic imagery in a subversive and at times satirical manner to advocate for equal representation and highlight examples of “religious hypocrisy” in which it sees Christianity being endorsed or promoted by schools or other public institutions over other belief systems.

The organization boasts more than 700,000 members across North America, Europe and Australia.

So they're doing a Satan bit. This is one of those ironic Satan clubs. Am i to believe that The Satanic Temple actually just an upstanding group of citizens to don't really believe in god and want to do nice things for the community, all while trolling Christians? I apologize I haven't been keeping up to date on where our society is at with the devil nowadays, but it sounds like were giving Satan a rebrand. Is that something we need to do? Rebrand the devil? "You know what guys Satan wasn't all that bad. If you look at it this way he's a pretty cool guy." I'm pretty certain that's what's going on here.

That just seems a bit aggressive. Maybe even unnecessary. Couldn't that group accomplish whatever the hell they're setting out to accomplish without attaching themselves to the devil to troll religious people. I guess it's kind of funny. The protestors in that article looked super annoying. Fuck it. I have no idea what the devil represents nowadays. I'm not as well versed in The Satanic Temple as I should be. Is it good? Is it bad? Jury is still out. But for the time being the After-School Satan Club remains in tact. Maybe keep tabs on those kids tho. We should make sure that $200k is spent in the name of "good Satan".