People Won't Stop Fucking The Nicki Minaj Wax Statue At Madame Tussaud's

I’m not the easiest person to turn on. Years and years of filthy internet porn has really disintegrated my brain to the point where the ol’ days of jerking off to a Victoria’s Secret magazine confound me more than the days of living without electricity. If it doesn’t involve handcuffs and a Hitachi then I’m really just not interested, if I wanted to watch Nickelodeon then I’d be on the couch instead of in my room with my pants around my ankles. But that wax figure right there? Yeah, I’d hump the shit out of it. Nicki is sexy as FUCK, wax or not. This is no one’s fault but Madame Tussaud. We’re just red-blooded humans here, we can’t be held responsible for what happens when we see a fat ass bent over doggy style. What’s next, you’re gonna put a naked chick in my bed then call me inappropriate when I have a go? No, that’s not right. I see a statue like that and I gotta throw it a hair pull, gotta smack that ass, gotta eat the booty like groceries. Best case scenario is that it’s actually Nicki doing one of those wax statue pranks, worst case is I get three thrusts in and cum in my pants over a sex doll. Either way I’m good.