Dabo Swinney Is Still Talking About The Radio Caller Who Roasted Him for Being 4-4, Would Like People To Stop Criticizing Him
The awesome delusion of Clemson Football to think that anybody in the world finds that Dabo Swinney clip anything other than hilarious at Dabo's expense is incredible. Boy do I love college football fans, and boy do I not like Dabo Swinney.
Here's a quote from Dabo Swinney as he's running down the hill (probably): "Weee! Look at me! My name is Dabo Swinney, I'm the best coach in college football and I have a dog's name. Look how fast I can run downhill. I can run this fast because Jesus loves me. I'm the face of Clemson football, and those players behind me (who I'll cut on the spot if they dare try to pass me down this hill) would be nothing if it wasn't for my incredible leadership skills. Also, I'm on TikTok, which is a really cool and relatable thing for a coach to do."
I don't know about you, but I've been very much enjoying watching Dabo Swinney lose this season. It's been a nice little treat for me every other Saturday. For whatever reason, Dabo Swinney just hasn't been able to get it done when it matters most this season. For the life of me, I can't figure out why. I was certain that his love of God and the world's highest horse that he rides to work every day would make up for the fact that he refuses to embrace the transfer portal like those other devil worshiping, heathenistic, rule-adapting teams in college football. You know, the ones who win games like Clemson used to.
SIDE NOTE: One of my very favorite videos to go back is this clip from Wake Forest vs Clemson last year, when Wake Forest realized, "Gee, if we just kick the ball directly do Dabo Swinney's son, ya know, the one who is only playing because of nepotism and Dabo Swinney inflated ego, then they'll have ZERO chance of starting with halfway decent field position."
That's some grade A college football content right there. Well, it's child abuse really. You can't expose your son like that Dabo. That's not a cool thing to do to someone you love.
But now I've got some of that pent up, old Dabo hate out of the way, let me get on to some more modern day Dabo hating. In case you hadn't seen, Dabo Swinney went on the radio to take calls from fans the other day for some reason. Unfortunately, the producers didn't do a great job screening the calls.
What a shame. At least Dabo Swinney handled the criticism well with a 5 minute rant during which he recommended the caller apply for the Clemson head coaching job himself to see if he could do a better job. That's definitely how an unbothered, not-mad person responds to minor criticism. And just for good measure, later this afternoon, to let the Clemson Tiger faithful really know how not-mad he really was, he held a press conference and talked about Tyler from Spartanburg some more.
"Here's the thing guys. We're playing like dog shit. We're not happy about it. I'm not asking anyone to be happy about it. I'm just asking that nobody criticize me in any way because that hurts my feelings. Yada yada yada something about the Old Testament."
That's not how college football works Dabo. Your fans aren't reasonable people. You've been really fucking good for a really long time and now you've set a standard for yourself. When you don't live up to it, you're gonna get idiots saying mean things to you. When you lose to NC State on the CW Network, you're going to hear some mean things from your own fans. Thankfully, they have a big game against Notre Dame this weekend that will give them an opportunity to right the ship, and definitely not send them below .500 this late in the season for the first time since 2010. You got this, Dabo.