A Not-That-Fancy Restaurant In Georgia Tacks On A $50 Fee For Customer's "Inability To Parent"

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TAMPA, Fla. (WFLA) — The internet is divided over a small detail at the bottom of a Georgia restaurant’s menu that charges parents for their misbehaving children.

Just below the gratuity disclaimer, the Toccoa Riverside Restaurant menu reads “Adult surcharge: For adults unable to parent $$$.”

A Florida mom, Lyndsey Landmann, who visited the restaurant with her family and four other families told TODAY.com, “I remember thinking, ‘No way this is real.'”

She said their table had 11 kids ranging from 3 to 8 years old.

Landmann added that she was actually surprised at how well-behaved they were during their meal.

But the owner disagreed.

When the owner approached their table after dessert, he pointed to the menu where it mentions the surcharge.

“At first I thought he was gonna compliment us and be like, ‘But you won’t be charged because your kids were so well-behaved,'” Landmann told TODAY.com.

That wasn’t the case.

The owner informed Landmann the bill would have an additional $50 added due to the kids being “too loud.”

Some of the adults had taken the kids outside after the meal, but the owner was still angry that the kids were “running around outside.”

When Landmann said the kids were quiet the whole time he got in her face and told her they “belonged in Burger King and not at his restaurant.”

When TODAY.com called the restaurant for a response, an employee told them, “We’re not going to comment on a policy we’ve had for years. We just want to live in the woods and cook.”

I'm trying to decide who's side I want to take here. On one hand, kids definitely suck. 9 of 10 problems in the world are caused by kids. They're always screaming at the table and starting food fights. Ordering plain cheeseburgers as opposed to the meticulously crafted recipe the chef worked tirelessly to perfect. They have to pee constantly, and always get it on the rim of the toilet. They all have annoying high pitched voices. Their heads are too big for their bodies. Some are fat. They smell. They're entitled. I can see why the owner of a prestigious restaurant would want to put in place some rules that discourage children from dining at their location. 

But on the other hand, I did some internet searching of this restaurant. They're not as fancy as they think they are. Take a look at their menu for starters. I've posted it in a tweet from a burner  

First things first, how about you pick a font guys. What the hell are we doing here? I count 5 different fonts. The primary font (if I'm not mistaking) is Calibri (Body) bold. That's not the font of a classy restaurant. Then they randomly throw some Times New Roman in the bottom right. 'WIFI' and 'Cash Discount' are written in God knows what. It honestly might be printed on computer paper.

Nothing about the menu is centered. Nothing on the left hand side of the menu is aligned correctly. What are you drafting your menu on? The backend of the Barstool Sports blog where for some reason the Tab button just doesn't work whatsoever? Look at the way Drinks sits above the soda choices. That's chaos. The fact that you're serving Mr Pibb at all… Your fancy "too good for children" restaurant can't be serving Mr. Pibb. Do you think adults are buying Mr. Pibb? Sure, I would, but I barely count as an adult. That's the definition of a kids drink.

Your WiFi password is 'sillybeans'. Do you know how confusing that is for a child? "Oh look, this restaurant has a fun sense of humor, I'm sure they won't mind a tiny bit of horse play." They're basically baiting children into behaving badly so they can make a quick buck. 

AND you're offering a cash discount? What kind of shady tax-free IRS avoiding operation are you running here? That's the brokest shit I've ever heard. You don't have fancy restaurant prices either. It costs me just as much money to eat at Five Guys. What the fuck is "Jeff's sauce" anyways? Who is Jeff and why is he cumming on the Nashville Hot Chicken Tenders Sandwich. 

The outside of your restaurant isn't that special either. It's not bad. I like your aesthetic. But it's barely a step up from Cracker Barrell. It kind of reminds me of noted children's waterpark The Great Wolf Lodge.

Ok, I guess the inside is pretty nice. You have a nice restaurant, I'll give you that. But it's not nice enough to warrant your "fuck them kids" policy. If you're going to be that restaurant, you better have your shit together. But if you insist on having this kids surcharge, can you at least not be such a prick about it on the menu? "Inability to parent" is harsh. That makes it so much more personal. If you just had a "kids fee" that would be so much better. Just let the families know up front if you want to bring children it's going to cost extra. That would do a great job deterring kids. The way you have it know, you're just calling strangers bad parents to their face. You're just asking for problems when you word it that way.

I apologize that was just way too many words for this story. I got carried away with that abomination of a menu.