Mick Jagger Selfishly Wants To Leave $500 Million Fortune To Charity Instead Of His Own Children

Daily Mail - Mick Jagger has hinted that his share of the Rolling Stones' back catalogue will be given to charity instead of his children. Rocker Mick, 80, said his eight children 'don't need $500million (£400m) to live on', so he has seemingly come up with another way to donate his fortune. In an interview with The Wall Street Journal, he said leaving the money to charity might 'do some good in the world.'

Despicable behavior. You should never give money to charity under any circumstances. Giving money to charity breeds short term dependency. In the long run, impoverished families will actually be worse off from your charitable donations. People need to learn to provide for themselves. You never know where your charity money is going anyways. You buy $10,000 in pink NFL breast cancer awareness merchandise, maybe $30 goes to research, and the remaining $9,970 is converted into gold coins and put into Roger Goodell's safe room so he can dive into it like Scrooge McDuck. 

Or something along those lines. I heard something like that once. Regardless, I were a young Jagger, I would be sending Mick every "charity is actually bad" argument I could find on the internet. Throw the whole book at him. 

I did a little Googling and found that Mick Jagger has 8 children. They all appear to have net worth's of $1 - $10 million. So you might think that they'll be fine either way, right? Absolutely not. If you've watched Succession, you know that a few million dollars in the bank is actually the worst amount of money a person can have. 

Can you imagine? $5 million? I'd rather be dead. Too much money to relate to your working man friends. Not enough money to be respected by celebrities. Just enough to live in an above average house and be comfortable. How boring. You can't hang your children out to dry like that if you're Mick Jagger. You didn't write Satisfaction so your kids can live in Scottsdale. Give them the rightful $62.5 million they each deserve. Then they can be respectable rich people. That's plenty enough money to get addicted to whatever drugs you want, party with the shallowest most vapid members of society, neglect your children, spiral into a deep dark depression, check yourself into a crazy expensive and luxurious rehab, get out with new lease on life, reconnect with your children, then run that whole cycle back one more time before finally settling down in a swanky country club and getting really into golf for the last 10 years of your life. That's the dream. Mick Jagger's kids deserve at least that much.