Sean Penn Believes The President Of Ukraine Being In Attendance Would've Prevented Will Smith From Slapping Chris Rock At The Oscars

In today's edition of "Shit that somehow isn't a headline for The Onion" we have Sean Penn, a world-renowned actor and two-time Academy Award winner, who believes that the famous Will Smith slap of Chris Rock would never have gone down had Volodymyr Zelenskyy, the president of Ukraine, been in attendance.

You can reach a point where you become so famous that you become stupid. I think that's the case with Sean Penn here. Sean Penn represents the stereotype of the pretentious actor that is so far up their own ass they don't understand the world at all. I'm gonna leave out the fact that this guy beat up John Leguizamo or that he used to hang out with El Chapo because, in fairness, he has done a lot of legitimate volunteer and charity work. He is also a brilliant actor. He deserved the Oscar that he won for the 2008 film "Milk." With that said, what the fuck Sean? 

I don't understand how there's any correlation between these things. And this is coming from someone who thought the Will Smith slap of Chris Rock was one the greatest moments in television history. The fact that a man, literally minutes before winning the Academy Award that he sought after for years, slapped the shit out of Chris Rock because he told a joke that was like a 3 out of 10 on the viciousness scale is an all-time moment. But that's what it was. It was just a wild moment on television. There wasn't a second where I went, "O fuck, we've got to connect this back to the war in Ukraine somehow." 

Actors truly are bizarre people. I know there are a lot of reclusive, tortured artists out there, but I would prefer that 100 times out of 100 instead of actors who actually think they're making a difference. I'm not talking about the people who go out in their spare time and volunteer. I don't have any real issue with an actor expressing their opinions on political or social issues, but you do that as a human being. No actor has ever changed the world by acting. It's the biggest problem with the Academy Awards. It's presented like it's this marvelous thing that's going to have an impact on the universe. It's not. It's just a bunch of pretentious actors handing awards to each other. The fact that this moment led to Sean Penn wanting to melt both of his Academy Awards is so baffling.

Can you imagine if this kind of shit existed in sports? "Goddamn, I can't believe Michigan lost the TCU last year. None of that would have happened had Captain Kangaroo been in attendance. That's what would've saved us." And look, I'm not a political guy, but I understand that the war in Ukraine is obviously a hot-button issue. But it speaks to the importance of picking your spots. When you shoehorn in a message in an environment that doesn't require any message or nuance, you come across like an asshole. That's my thesis.