Must Watch: An Airplane Passenger Had An All-Time Meltdown After Being Stuck On A Flight With A Baby That Was Crying For 45 Minutes Straight
I think we've reached the point where complaining about babies on airplane has become such a worn out internet take that I roll my eyes every time I see it, much like bacon being the greatest food ever back in the day and pretty much anything to do with zombie apocalypses before that. Especially since the invention of headphones decades ago paired with the smartphone, MP3 player, tablet, computer, seat back screen, and in-flight wifi should make that baby's cries the furthest thing from your mind as you soar through the air hundreds of miles per hour.
Don't get me wrong, as a parent I completely understand where the complaining comes from. I get that it sucks to hear a screaming human unleash a sound that has been programmed in our DNA to be off-putting so we would keep these little fun sponges alive so our species could continue. My kids didn't fly in a plane for their entire their lives until two weeks ago when they were 8 and 5 years old because I didn't want to deal with a crying baby on a plane let alone all the full grown adults that would stomp their feet if my baby dared to make a noise for a couple of minutes. God forbid these people that get 8 hours of sleep every night (which is a number parents of newborns don't hit for years) to wake up early from their little plane nap because a baby started crying because it feels like its head is exploding due to the change in altitude and it doesn't know what the fuck a plane is.
ALL THAT BEING SAID, I have no choice but to love the screaming man in that video simply because he is great at what he does, which is to yell and complain. I've never heard someone bitch and moan with more authority than this man, and that's coming from someone that has shared an office and done multiple live Mets streams with this man.
I won't discount Frank's anger or delivery at all since he's clearly heading to Cooperstown for his rants when it's all said and done. But Frank usually breaks up rants with some sort of song or made up stat about a Mets utility player 95% of casual baseball fans don't know. However my man on that plane was dropping truth bombs from 30,000 feet the entire video and then some at the airport. Being able to take the "You're yelling" jab from the flight attendant with a "SO IS THE BABY" reply is the stuff of legend. Asking if the "motherfucker", in this case a crying infant, paid extra had me swooning. But topping all that off with a "Fuck you and shut up" uttered with the mix of vile and bravado I have never heard this side of Samuel L. Jackson was something truly special, which caused me to tag this with one of my two Must Watch tags of the year.
If Portnoy doesn't head down the road to Fort Lauderdale and hire this guy by the end of the day, I will be absolutely floored and honestly kinda worried that the boss is losing his talent scouting touch.