Dalia Lama Issues Notes App Apology For Trying To Tongue Kiss A Boy

Over the weekend a video surfaced of the Dalai Lama, the top spiritual leader of Tibetan Buddhism, interacting with a young boy in a way that'll make your skin crawl. He invites the boy up to meet him, and at first just holds the boy's chin to acknowledge him, but then he points to his tongue, apparently instructs the boy to suck his tongue (trying not to vomit as I type this part), sticks it out and brings the boy's face in to his face. Thankfully the boy, who appears very uncomfortable and is surrounded by grown adults who are acting like this is fine, does not follow along with the Dalai Lama's request, and the moment passes. (You can find the video easily but I didn't include it because that's too much heebie-jeebies for a Monday). 

Anyways, now that it's going viral the Dalai Lama's official Twitter account has issued a statement saying he was totally just goofin':

In terms of notes app apologies it falls somewhere in between Ja Rule's "My bad about Fyre Fest" atonement & Logan Paul's "Sorry for posting footage and making jokes next to a man's dead body"; not the most effective and makes you look even worse in the moment. 

I know different religions & cultures have different customs that I'm completely ignorant to, but a general rule of the road for me anywhere in the world is that adults who aren't mom & dad just straight up should not physically come into contact with other kids. Putting kids in situations where they feel compelled to comply (especially when uncomfortable) is bad, even if the adult's intentions aren't bad. I'll never make my son hug anyone he doesn't want to, not even his grandparents/aunts/uncles, and I won't put up with anyone guilting him for refusing stuff like that. 

Along those lines, I know there's a lot of great churches & good people out there, but I'm sure as hell never leaving my kid alone with a religious leader of any sort. Nope, nope, nope. (Especially as someone who grew up big time Catholic and who knew a 35 year old youth group leader named Billy who booked a hotel room and drove 3 states with a case of Bartles & James for some of the girls I went to church camp with in 11th grade. And not to mention stuff like what came out about the Baltimore archdiocese last week. Not great!). 

This is also faaaaaaar from the first time a bunch of adults stood around doing NOTHING as a religious leader was openly weird with a kid, which always makes me feel crazy. I think about how in religion specifically, across so many faiths, it seems like church leaders get a pass for absolute, painfully obvious scumbaggery. Maybe it's because dangling the prospect of eternal damnation over people's heads keeps em from getting too loud & rowdy. 

Anyways, I am declaring the Dalai Lama officially cancelled after this, which means he should be doing a sold out tour across the US by 2024. Would not recommend bringing the kids.