The 2023 Way Too Late XFL Pre-Season Power Rankings
The XFL kicks off this Saturday. 8 teams. 54 men on each. Most have seen too many off-seasons, or too few. It's going to be great! As these teams have not yet played and I have nothing to go off, I will be ranking them based mainly on how much I like their team name and uniforms. These rankings are subject to change weekly based on each team's performance and whether they ruin my parlay.
Here are the way too late pre-season rankings.
1. Arlington Renegades
Relocating all the way from Dallas, Renegades are a strong frontrunner for this season. They are based in the home city of the XFL where all teams will be based out of. The team will have a double home field advantage as they only have to travel for away games, while other teams in the league will have to travel to their home cities for home games. Head Coach Bob Stoops returns to the franchise after leading the Oklahoma Sooners to a 2021 Alamo Bowl victory. Former Jaguars QB Kyle Sloter will start.
2. D.C. Defenders
The Defenders return with a new and updated logo. The home stadium is Audi field, where the MLS D.C. Union play. Jason Ta'amu who led the USFL Bandits in passing yards and touchdowns last year was assigned to the team in January. D.C.'s head coach is former Jaguars return man, Reggie Barlow.
3. San Antonio Brahmas
The city of San Antonio deserves this team. They came out in full force and averaged 27,000 fans for AAF Commanders games back in 2019. Named after the bull which Dwayne Johnson used as a symbol in wrestling and his personal brands, the Brahmas are coached by Super Bowl MVP Hines Ward and will play their home games at The Alamodome. Former Jaguars OL Norman Price will be blocking for the Brahmas.
4. St. Louis Battlehawks
Before the league suspended operations in 2020, the Battlehawks were the darling of the XFL. They had the largest social media presence, they led the league in TV viewership to start the season, and had consecutive sold out crowds. The Battlehawks will again play at The Dome, this time with Head Coach Anthony Becht and a defense featuring former Jaguars SS Nate Meadors.
5. Houston Roughnecks
Houston is back with updated logos and uniforms. The league had to abandon the 2020 team logos after the trademark applications were opposed by both The Tennessee Titans and New England Patriots. The new helmet pays homage to the Texan flag. I didn't think I would like a multi-tone helmet, but this one looks a heck of a lot better than the Jags old helmet. Wade Phillips will lead the team as Head Coach. Roughnecks will play their home games at TDECU Stadium, home of the Houston Cougars. From my research, I was not able to determine if any coaches or players were once connected to the Jaguars.
6. Seattle Sea Dragons
Formerly the Seattle Dragons, they have rebranded and added some alliteration with the "Sea". Seattle is the furthest team city from Arlington. The Sea Dragons will be playing their home games at Lumen field where the Seahawks play. Former Head Coach of the UFL Florida Huskers, Jim Haslett, will reprise that role with the Sea Dragons. 2002 Jaguars Offensive Assistant Coach Ty Knott will coach the wide receivers and special teams, which includes former NFL receiver Josh Gordon. Gordon will be receiving passes from former Cowboys star, Ben DiNucci.
7. Vegas Vipers
What a great name. It's Vegas. It's Vipers. It's alliteration. You may think that this is the team from Tampa Bay just relocated to Vegas, but that is not the case. This is a new franchise that just happens to share the same team name and very similar logo. Rod Woodson is the Vipers Head Coach and Bob Wylie will be coaching the offensive line.
Former Jaguars linebacker Martrell Spaight will play for the Vipers. Vegas home games will be played at Cashman Field, which is a former baseball stadium, turned into a soccer stadium which will be shared by the Vipers and Las Vegas Lights FC of the USL.
8. Orlando Guardians
It's the team closest to my hometown, but I had to put them 8. This is the old Tampa Bay Vipers team which has moved to Orlando, but also taken the team name of the former New York based team, The Guardians. The team logo has been altered slightly from the once Gargoyle head to a wild cats head with updated green and grey colors. The Guardians will play at Camping World Stadium, where the Citrus and Cheez-It Bowl's are played. Seminole Legend and Super Bowl XXXVI Champion Terrell Buckley is the Head Coach.
Again, these are the pre-season rankings. They are subject to change and they will.