Big Dumb Idiot (Billionaire) Managed To Lose Money In The Enron, Madoff, And FTX Scandals

(Live look at 87-year-old Robert Belfer investing in FTX.)

Listen, you might be a bad investor, but you'll never be as bad Robert Belfer.

Robert Belfer, an OG nepo baby, saw $2 billion worth of equity evaporate when Enron collapsed. Then he got caught up in the Bernie Madoff scandal to the tune of "tens of millions" (although, judging by the lawsuit against him to clawback funds, it sounds like he may have been boys with Bernard). And most recently he got burned by the collapse of FTX.

And all I can think is that he was one Elizabeth Holmes' Theranos investment away from completing the four investments of the apocalypse.

NY Post - A New York oil baron who lost billions in the collapse of Enron and who also invested tens of millions in Bernie Madoff’s Ponzi scheme has also taken a hit in the implosion of Sam Bankman-Fried’s cryptocurrency exchange FTX, according to a report.

Robert Belfer, 87, whose family has made several philanthropic donations to institutions like the Metropolitan Museum of Art as well as Harvard University and Yeshiva University, was listed in court documents as a shareholder of FTX, according to the Financial Times.

The documents show that Belfer Investment Partners and Lime Partners LLC, two firms linked to the family business, held shares in FTX and its US subsidiary, FTX US.

The two entities held a combined stake of $34.5 million as of early last year when they participated in an equity fundraising round, according to court documents cited by Financial Times.

Robert Belfer is the Polish-born son of Arthur Belfer, the multimillionaire oil executive who fled his native Poland after the invasion by Nazi Germany.

Arthur Belfer came to the United States and founded Belco Petroleum Corp., which grew into a Fortune 500 company. His son eventually rose to become president of the firm.

In the mid-1980s, Belco Petroleum merged with InterNorth, Inc., the Omaha-based energy firm that eventually merged with Houston Natural Gas to become Enron.

The Belfer family became one of Enron’s largest stakeholders, owning some $2 billion worth of equity.

But in the early 2000s, Enron, which was once worth as much as $70 billion, declared bankruptcy after it was learned that company executives used illegal accounting practices to hide its massive debts from investors and creditors.

Imagine being poor Arthur Belfer (may he rest in peace). This dude escapes Nazi persecution, goes on to build a multibillion dollar oil company… all for his son Bob to piss it away. It's kinda like Tommy Boy, but Bob is actually trying, and the story doesn't end in heartwarming fashion.

Oh, and also, what the hell was Bob doing investing in a crypto firm? He's an 80-something year-old man. Isn't he supposed to hate change? It certainly couldn't have been him investing in it, right? Does this mean there is another generation of shithead Belfer's that are looking to piss away their grandfather's riches?

Make. It. Stop.

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