The Absolute Saddest Stats For Week 18 Of The NFL

Stathole1/11/2023 4:30 PM

Bob Levey. Getty Images.

We made it fam! 18 weeks of NFL sad stats to supply sad fans of sad teams with some chuckles to get through the misery. Upon starting as a part-time blogger here at Barstool at the beginning of the NFL season, I made it a mission to put my data programming skills to no good and find absolutely useless stats that serve no purpose other than minor entertainment. Well here we finally are atop Week 18. I hope you enjoyed the climb. Before we get started, big props are in order to Texans fans. Your team ended the season on a high note by winning the final game so you won't find any sad stats on the Texans this week! Way to go!

Let's get to it. Final week. Week 18.

Sad Stat #1: The Los Angeles Rams Officially Suffered The Worst Super Bowl Hangover Ever

I first started tracking this in Sad Stats Week 12 when the Rams were on pace to have the lowest win percentage for a Super Bowl winning team the following year. And they sure went the distance. Only the 1982 49ers won less games (3), but due to the shortened year eked out a slightly better win percentage. There really is hell to pay for this franchise selling their soul and the souls of their kids and grandkids to win a Super Bowl. All those depleted draft spots and pending cap hell makes the future look truly bleak. But a good man takes this all on the chin and faces the problems he causes. When you dig yourself this deep a hole, there's nowhere to run. Your only option is to dig yourself back out. Right?

Sad Stat #2: Diontae Johnson finished the season with the most catches in NFL history (86) without catching a touchdown

Johnson caught two clutch touchdown-less passes in Week 18 to jump to the number one spot of all-time topping Roger Craig (1986) and James Wilder (1984) who both had 85 catches. The embarrassing part is that both of these players were running backs. The next most catches for a wide receiver was Raymond Berry with 75 back in 1961. Shout out though to Laviska Shenault Jr. last year who finished the season touchdown-less with 63.

Sad Stat #3: Speaking of touchdown dry spells - Josh Jacobs has NEVER caught a receiving touchdown in his career

This one is weird because any fantasy owner this year knows Jacobs was a beast and heavily involved in the passing game for a running back. He now has 164 career receptions which puts him behind only Gerald Riggs' 204 on the leaderboard for career catches without a receiving touchdown. Jacobs still has a long way to go to catch Riggs, but after just four years in the league, he's outpacing Riggs who took ten years to get that 204.

Sad Stat #4: Tim "The Plague of" Boyles threw as many interceptions as he did completions (2) for the Bears

This one is actually not sad for a Bears fan like myself. Nate Peterman was called upon to drive the tank with his "specific set of skills" in Week 18 and it became clear after completing too many passes that he wasn't getting the job done. But since Bears GM Ryan Poles is the master mind that he is, the Bears had a plan B: A plague of Boyles. Only two other times in at least 20 or so years has a player thrown two interceptions while completing only two passes. Alex Van Pelt for the Bills in Week 8 of 2003, and Matt Moore for the Dolphins in Week 16 of 2013.

If we're being honest here, Tim Boyle might have been the best pickup for the Bears this past off-season. It's good to know he's good for more than just taking a few knees for Aaron Rodgers or playing in some garbage time. He is a true tanking specialist and quite frankly if I'm his agent, this would be my pitch for teams in a similar spot at the 2022 Bears. If Boyle isn't getting incentive pay for interceptions, he needs to find a new agent. I am, of course, available.

Sad Stat #5: It's been a terrible year for a horse, of course

The Colts and Broncos have shown up on this blog over and over so why not beat these dead horses one last time. What a tough season for any NFL fan in the horse community. Statistically speaking, 2022 was the third worst season from a win percentage perspective as the Colts and Broncos combined for 9-24-1 record. But one could argue when you consider the expectations involved for both teams, this was easily the most disappointing year for fans watching from the stables. Remember when all of our dumb asses thought the Broncos were a sneaky Super Bowl pick? And the Colts were supposed to be fixed after upgrading from Carson Wentz to Matt Ryan. 2022 was supposed to be a trip to derby but in turned into a harsh detour to the glue factory.

Bonus Sad Stat #6: The New York Jets ended with the leagues longest touchdown scoring drought of the year at 33 drives

You may have heard this stat from Billy Football, but it hits different when you see it along with every other team's longest touchdown scoring drought of 2022. For God's sake, the longest the Chiefs ever went was seven drives which happened twice. That's pretty much only half of a game.

Not to rub it in Jets fans, but here's every Jets consecutive drive without a touchdown streak longer than the Chiefs seven, which pretty much spans consistently from the start of the season to the end.

That's a wrap for sad stats 2022. I already can't wait to run it back in 2023. But if you're seeing this blog for the first time, give the entire season a binge with the links below to pass the time before Wild Card Weekend. And if you're an NBA fan (or hater), look out because I've been crunching data behind the scenes to make a splash in NBA content coming soon.

Sad Stats: Season One